k Page 2573 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Classic Man: "Going Bald Is One Of The Most Severe Tests"
Frequently in this space, we will consult a different entry in the 1987 book The Modern Man’s Guide to Life to see how the advice therein has aged. Previously, we discussed how to tell if a lady is coming onto you; today, let’s talk tips for coping with baldness....

Florida Coach Jim McElwain Apologizes For Blowing Up At A Player
Jim McElwain says he regrets tearing into junior RB Kelvin Taylor on the sideline after Taylor drew a penalty for a “throat slash” touchdown celebration gesture late in Florida’s 31-24 win over East Carolina on Saturday, saying he’s already heard from his 94-year-old mother that it wasn’t right....

I Want To Kiss This Hockey Player's Performance Of "Free Fallin'" On The Mouth
My knowledge of Ryan Hollweg’s career as a hockey player admittedly ends at his Wikipedia page. But because of this video, he’s now one of my all-time favorite athletes....

The Giants' Collapse Was Even Dumber Than It Looked (And It Already Looked Pretty Dumb)
It was one thing when it appeared that the Giants’ merely brainfarted 40 extra seconds to the Cowboys for a game-winning drive that needed 33 of them. Now as players discuss the calls in the huddle and from the sideline, it’s so, so much worse: the Giants a) did not realize how many timeouts the Cow...

Kam Chancellor's Holdout Couldn't Be Going Any Better
Kam Chancellor is still negotiating with the Seahawks for a new contract, and as his holdout bled into Week 1 of the regular season, undrafted sophomore Dion Bailey took his place at strong safety Sunday against the Rams. It was clear that Chancellor’s starting job will be waiting for him when he co...

An Inflatable, Life-Size Ben Wallace, And Other Things You Bought While Drunk
According to a recent study on this very website, quite a few people make serious life decisions under the influence of alcohol. Go figure! On Friday, we asked our readers to tell us about the craziest things they’ve bought while drunk, and among the usual stuff (tattoos, memorabilia, and a subscrip...

Here's Will Ferrell's At-Bat In <i>Ferrell Takes The Field</i>, Which Was A Drag Otherwise
Spoiler Alert: They don’t really let Will Ferrell pitch in Ferrell Takes the Field, his stunt HBO doc where he plays every position (plus designated hitter) for 10 different MLB teams during one day of 2015 spring training action in Arizona. No, in his 90-second stint with the Dodgers, he throws one...

Dez Bryant Got Hurt, Stayed Hyped
One of the worst things about Week 1 is the inevitable rash of injuries that knocks a half-dozen or so stars out for a good portion of the season. Dez Bryant’s injury wasn’t the most serious of the day, but he’ll need surgery on his broken foot and will miss the next four to six weeks. Don’t worry a...

The Giants' Loss Was Inexplicable
This wasn’t one of those bad, game-killing decisions that requires hindsight to identify as a mistake. It’s no less baffling the morning after as it was the moment Eli Manning floated the ball out of the end zone to stop the clock and gave the Cowboys a full minute-and-a-half to complete their comeb...

The NFL's New Extra Point Rule Is Great
For all the worried exegesis of the NFL’s corn-fed rulebook this offseason, not much of it was aimed at football’s best rule change in years: the new extra point. ...

Pacman Jones Rips Amari Cooper's Helmet Off, Slams His Head Into It
Welcome to the NFL rook! Jones is going to have to find something to do next weekend. Here are some ideas, man....

Seahawks Choose To Run This Time With Game On The Line, Still Lose
The Seahawks lost a wild one in overtime in St. Louis today. Nick Foles took the field for the first time as a Ram and he was very solid with 297 yards and touchdowns via air and ground, but the truly remarkable part of the game was the *fart noise* that was the Seahawks’ overtime effort. ...

Low Man Wins
Work on that pad level, Tommy Brasher. ...


The Miami Dolphins Are The First Team To Earn A Yakety Sax Treatment
Congratulations, Dolphins. This Boots’s for you....

Luke Kuechly Leaves Game With Scary Head Injury
Luke Kuechly left today’s game against the Jaguars with what looks like a head injury. Late in the second quarter, Kuechly tackled T.J. Yeldon with his head and immediately went into a daze and fell over. The trainer then fell down and knocked his helmet off, which would be funny were it not involvi...

Goddammit, Fireman Ed Is Back
Because everything involving the Jets should be measured in its relation to the buttfumble, today marks the first time since halftime of the Thanksgiving night game that Fireman Ed crammed his head-butt into a modern structural helmet to lead Jets fans in remedial reading drills. Fuck him. ...

Travis Kelce Knows How To Celebrate A Touchdown
The Chiefs are out here taking it to the Texans. Brian Hoyer tossed an interception to rookie Marcus Peters on his first throw as a Texan, and Alex Smith already has already thrown two touchdowns to Travis Kelce. ...

Report: Jason Pierre-Paul Is Missing More Fingers, Could Miss Season
According to a report from ESPN’s Dan Graziano, the New York Giants got a chance to examine Jason Pierre-Paul’s fireworks-torn hand for themselves and are internally worried that the injury is worse than initially thought and could keep him out for the season. This is because, uh, well, the team did...

Moses Malone Is Dead At 60
Moses Malone died in his sleep early this morning in Norfolk, VA. He was 60. ...