no Page 4594 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
BREAKING: Dan Uggla Is Not Joe DiMaggio
Cubs win, Cubs win, and the Braves' second baseman's hitting streak ends at 33. Aw....
The New York Islanders Will Have A Party To Celebrate The Bloody Low Point Of Last Season
Undeterred by that whole Probably Moving to Kansas City thing, the Islanders are throwing a party at Champions Sports Bar in Uniondale, NY to celebrate the goriest night of last night's hockey season....
Future First Man Marcus Bachmann Eating A Corn Dog? Future First Man Marcus Bachmann Eating A Corn Dog.
Michele Bachmann won the Ames, Iowa straw poll yesterday, which, according to Nate Silver, means she's the favorite to win the Iowa caucuses next year. And, if you follow this syllogism to its logical extreme, she's gonna win the Republican nomination and then the presidency. Or something....
I-Team: Help Us Solve The Mystery Of Mitch Albom's Ears
Tipster Chad D. (or Chadd?) writes in, [sic]s and all:...
Our Five Favorite Funny Athlete Movie/TV Appearances
Plenty of athletes are funny. But these are our top 5 performances by athletes being funny on purpose in a movie or tv show....
Wisely, Ned Colletti Is Already Plotting His Exit Strategy
"Q: You're big on hockey. Any desire to be an NHL GM?...
Get To Know A Comic You Probably Don't Know: Matt Goldich
Who? Matt is from Philadelphia, though he started performing in New York while he was a writer on Stump The Schwab. He went on to write for The Late Show with David Letterman. Matt's style is subtle and hyperarticualte. Watch the first joke on his clip because it is one of my favorite jokes by a c...
Zack Greinke Bunts To You From Germany And/Or The Future
Your morning roundup for August 14, the day the New York Times trend piece hit a new low.....
Care To Guess Who "The Super Hot, Super Gay, Super Conservative Christian NFL Player In Need Of A Beard" Is?
This exchange between someone in Massachusetts and someone in Illinois was brought to you by "Texts From Last Night." To each their own. (H/T several tipsters)...
Let's Watch Two Chimps Kissing And Biting One Another
This video was taken at the Maryland Zoo in Baltimore. Zoological voyeurism is the new black....
Here's A Video About Hunting Mork Encino With A Pellet Pistol
Spoiler Alert: Mork "Hunting Bait" Encino survives this segment about his whole "you can hunt me for $10K (or $12K if you want me naked)" schtick. How can I be sure? Because he sent a private Twitter message this week about his talks to appear on the George Lopez Tonight show in the days before th...
Plaxico Burress Talks About What Happens When You Shoot Yourself
Here's one choice selection from an HBO "Real Sports" segment on Jets WR Plaxico Burress, who shot himself with an unlicensed handgun in a Manhattan night club on Nov. 28, 2008:...
This Week In Unintentional-Dong Picture Submissions
Another week, another onslaught of people seeing phallus in unlikely places, capturing it on film and sending it in. Like that fountain that Luke S. saw in Siena, Italy, a few days back....
Membership In "The James Bond Gang" May Have Cost Troubled Basketball Player His NBA Dream
In 2004, Sean Banks was named Conference USA freshman of the year for his court work at the University of Memphis. A year later, he was declared academically ineligible for his school work, or lack thereof. What followed was an undrafted free-agent singing with the Hornets that ended because of his...
Once-Comatose Former Swimsuit Model Becomes First Woman To Ever Enter Australian Rodeo Event
Tammara Wrenn became the first female to ever enter "the southern hemisphere's biggest rodeo, at Mt Isa in Queensland" this weekend. This is noteworthy for two reasons....
Get To Know A Comic You Probably Don't Know: Kyle Grooms
Who? Kyle Grooms is originally from New Jersey but started his stand-up career on South Florida's urban comedy scene. Style is quick and clever, punchlines come after the beat, a little like Dave Attell but structured around stories like Birbiglia....
Kendrick Perkins Charged With Being Drunk-And-Disorderly In Texas
It's been a rough day and a half for Kendrick Perkins. First, on a Thursday night when the locked-out Oklahoma City Thunder big man was slated to host former Celtics teammate Rajon Rondo "at an autograph signing at the Mid County Chick-Fil-A restaurant ... to help raise money for the Port Arthur Li...
Youth-Baseball Umpire In Missouri Claims Pitcher, Catcher Conspired To Hit Him With A Pitch
In the fifth-inning of a big 18-and-under Mac-N-Seitz Midwest Championships and Showcase baseball game, home plate umpire Kyle Reynolds detected shenanigans were afoot. They were the sort of shenanigans in which a catcher allegedly jumps out of the way of a pitch so it strikes the umpire behind hi...
Broncos Kicker Charged Criminally With DUI, Morally With Ditching A Strip-Club Worker In A Hotel Lobby
Word out of Denver this morning indicated that Broncos kicker Matt Prater was charged with drunkenly backing his Chevy TrailBlazer into a silver sedan parked outside of a Hyatt Suites in Greenwood Village last week. Witnesses reported the driver then went into the hotel, which is where things get s...
Presenting A Chris Mullin Career Retrospective With Violins And Real Talk
Your morning roundup for Aug. 13, a day that can strengthen you personally, professionally, physically and spiritually. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....