ryan Page 61 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ryan Fitzpatrick Is Finally Ryan Fitzpatricking
Oh boy. Last weekend Ryan Fitzpatrick was strutting around like a Times Square Conor McGregor impersonator, looking very secure as Tampa Bay’s starting quarterback after consecutive 400-yard performances. It’s now halftime of his team’s Monday Night Football matchup with the Pittsburgh Steelers, and...
Ryan Fraser Is The Best Little Fella In The Premier League
Bournemouth winger Ryan Fraser is extremely cool. He’s super fast, loves running at defenders, can muscle his way into and around the penalty area almost at will, and when he gets there, he’s pretty good at slipping the ball to a teammate or smashing it at the goal himself. These traits are common a...
Ryan Fitzpatrick Is Stealing Jameis Winston's Job
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers improved to 2-0 on this young season by beating the defending champion Philadelphia Eagles 27-21 this afternoon. They won the game thanks in large part to backup quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick, who will be elevated to the Bucs’ Plan A if he keeps playing like this....
Never Mind, The Raiders Actually Want Martavis Bryant Now
The Oakland Raiders dropped wide receiver Martavis Bryant 11 days ago, insisting at the time that the guy they traded a third-round pick for on draft night wasn’t released because of a possible drug suspension, but rather because he wasn’t very good and kept missing practice. Now, they’ve taken him ...
Madison Bumgarner And Ryan Braun Started A Nice Little Feud
Brewers outfielder Ryan Braun had a tense standoff Sunday with Giants workhorse Madison Bumgarner, after the latter threw inside and pegged the former. With this, Bumgarner loaded the bases with two outs and paid dearly....
The Falcons Were A Disaster In The Red Zone
The Falcons began the 2018 season the same way they ended 2017: an empty possession in the red zone in the waning seconds of a close loss to the Eagles, in the same end zone in the same stadium in Philly. It was the same symptom of the same problem that plagued their offense for much of last year—on...
Raiders Insist Martavis Bryant's Release Was About Competition And Not His Impending Drug Suspension
Martavis Bryant’s career with the Oakland Raiders lasted all of four months before the team decided to cut him from the final roster....
Moron Supreme Court Nominee<em></em> Doesn't Believe Dez Caught It
We already knew that illegitimate Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh had predictably conservative political views, god-awful taste in food, and questionable finances, but does it shock you to learn that he has bad sports takes, too?...
Kobe, Come Out Of Retirement You Coward
Shaquille O’Neal recently told a fast-talking paparazzo that he’d “heard” Kobe Bryant was coming out of retirement to play with LeBron James and the Lakers. This was almost certainly a joke, but as a pretext for silly-season speculation—and a cucumber season blog from one horrifyingly bored blogger—...
The 76ers Are Getting All The Way Out Of The Colangelo Business
To the profound disappointment of exactly zero 76ers fans, Jerry Colangelo will be stepping away from the organization at the end of this calendar year, according to a report from Tim Bontemps of the Washington Post:...
Dez Bryant Is Going Off On The Cowboys And Sean Lee
How are you spending your Friday evening? Free agent wide receiver Dez Bryant is spending his ripping the Cowboys—most notably shithead VP Stephen Jones, linebacker Sean Lee, and offensive tackle Travis Frederick—to shreds....
Darts Crowd Just Completely Loses Its Shit Over A Perfect Nine-Dart Run
I suppose it’s worth setting up this clip with a bit of context: What you’re about to see is Gary “The Flying Scotsman” Anderson getting 501 with the minimum nine throws during a darts tournament in Blackpool, England. This is essentially the darts version of a perfect game, so you should be impress...
Bull Rider Ryan Dirteater Still Loves The Sport That Breaks Him
Professional bull riding is a sport built on survival. In the short term, that means riding a bull for eight seconds and then figuring out a way to dismount it without getting your head caved in. In the long term, that means knowing when to leave it behind, before it can finish destroying you....
Ryan Lochte Suspended A Year Over Incredible Instagram Self-Own
The United States Anti-Doping Agency announced this morning that jolly bro airhead Ryan Lochte would be suspended for 14 months for “his use of a prohibited method.” As the language of USADA’s release hints at, Lochte’s is not a normal doping violation, which is not surprising since Lochte is not a ...
Soccer Player Blows Off Some Steam By Drop-Kicking Opponent In The Stomach
Sometimes, in the late stages of a certain loss in a big game, a soccer player might boot the ball with an unnecessarily strong kick in an effort to physically expel some of their inner frustration. No problem, you see it all the time. Less common—and less forgivable—is deciding that your discontent...
Kobe Bryant Still Wants To Help Your Kids Be More Like Kobe Bryant<em></em><em></em>
During the question-and-answer session that followed the screening of Kobe Bryant’s short film Dear Basketball at the Tribeca Film Festival last spring, Bryant said a lot of things that would have been very hard to credit from anyone less driven or deeply weird than Kobe Bryant. He used a lot of the...
Joe Maddon Shamelessly Reams Out Umpire Without Getting Tossed
There’s no lip reading required to figure out why Cubs manager Joe Maddon was pissed off in Sunday’s 7-4 win over the Padres. Home plate umpire Ryan Blakney’s strike zone was indecipherable all day—both teams complained about it—so in the eighth inning, Maddon had had enough....
Bleacher Report Founder Wins Right To Put His Sweaty Hands All Over The Gawker Archives
The archives of our former sister site Gawker now belong to this goon. Bryan Goldberg, the founder of Bleacher Report, a sports site for idiots, and Bustle, the women’s site that assumes women are stupid, won the rights to the defunct Gawker.com in a bankruptcy auction today, as reported by the Wall...
Hunter S. Thompson Told Jim Irsay To Draft Ryan Leaf Over Peyton Manning
Hunter S. Thompson predicted, in the most general sense, the coming of Donald Trump, or at least the flourishing of the reactionary, retaliatory, mutually-assured-destructive base that put him and his ilk into power. (He also noted, as early as anyone, that the American experiment had peaked and per...
Mariners Reliever Ryan Cook Yelled "Shit!" So Loudly After Giving Up A Walk-Off Homer To Giancarlo Stanton, MLB Had To Edit It Out
The Yankees capped a comeback from down 5-0 with a Giancarlo Stanton walk-off home run to beat the Mariners 7-5. It was Stanton’s first walk-off as a Yankee. Cool story. We’re not here for that. We’re here for the swear word!...