si Page 836 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Donnie Walsh Out As Knicks Prez, Fans Begin Zeke Freakout
If you are a Knicks fan who flew into a panic earlier this year while reading about Isiah Thomas's secret influence on the team's operations, then this news is bad for you and your vital organs. Walsh is stepping down at month's end, after three years in charge, owner James Dolan tells the media....

Big Ten AD Not Named Gene Smith Says You Can Win Without Cheating
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Gene Smith's job is safe. Barry Alvarez takes a stand....

An Edmonton Oiler Picked Up A Hitchhiking Bono In Vancouver
As a young driver, they used to tell me: Always pick up hitchhikers. You never know when one of them will be the guy who scored Spider-Man: the Musical....

War Criminal To Advise FIFA On Compliance
Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, newly re-installed FIFA dictator Sepp Blatter has announced that that avatar of moral probity, Henry Kissinger, will advise FIFA's new corporate governance and compliance body from his seat on a "committee of wise persons."...

The Underground Website Where You Can Buy Any Drug Imaginable
Making small talk with your pot dealer sucks. Buying cocaine can get you shot. What if you could buy and sell drugs online like books or light bulbs? Now you can: Welcome to Silk Road. [Gawker]...

This Story About Rigged Italian Soccer Astoundingly Has Nothing To Do With Sepp Blatter
Sixteen people—including current Serie B/C and former Serie A players, including ex-Lazio captain Giuseppe Signori—were arrested today related to fishy results throughout Italy's leagues. We suppose this thing is a bit more common in Europe than it is here, but wow. This is the biggest match-fixing ...

Here Is The Giant Bill Simmons <i>NYT Mag</i> Profile You Were All Waiting For
It's called "Can Bill Simmons Win the Big One?" and it's by The Bronx Is Burning author Jonathan Mahler. Never mind that his book was made into an ESPN miniseries and that's not disclosed in the piece....

Watch This Half-Court Buzzer Beater That Clinched A Romanian League Title
Former BU Terrier Tyler Morris—who also played high school ball alongside Greg Oden—sank the winner for U-Mobitelco BT. They beat CSU Asesoft Ploiesti to win their league. We'd tell you more, but the Bucharest bureau isn't answering their phones....

Mark Cuban Is Silent, And We Are Baffled
Cubes has been known to, from time to time, talk: sometimes about sports journalism, sometimes about WiFi capacity, and sometimes he just lets the pictures talk....

For Jim Tressel, It's Been A Strange Few Months
Tressel resigned as head coach of Ohio State Monday morning. Some have suggested he departed so abruptly because of George Dohrmann's story in this week's Sports Illustrated....

Buckeye Nation Has Some Nasty Words For Former WR And Newspaper Source Ray Small
Small, who played for OSU from 2006-2010, gave a long interview to OSU's student paper last week, in which he said, among other things, that he sold all his Big Ten championship rings and got some exquisite deals from local car dealerships. "I don't see why it's a big deal," he said....

Here's Video Of A College Catcher Almost Throwing A Baseball Through A College Pitcher's Neck
When University of Florida catcher Mike Zunino flung the ball toward second base during yesterday's game against Georgia, it's not like he meant to nail his sophomore pitcher Brian Johnson behind the ear or anything. He just did....

Here's Video Of Lionel Messi's UEFA-Championship Winning Goal For FC Barcelona
Final score: Barcelona 3, Manchester United 1. In retrospect, the game ended the moment Lionel Messi seized the Best Player In The World chatter and made it reality....

It Wouldn't Be The Start Of Memorial Day Weekend Without A Gnarly Skiing Video
Red Bull and U.S. Freestyle skier Simon Dumont pretty much chopped up Squaw Valley's half-pipe. They used lasers, angles, machinery and a touch of crazy to do so....

Hockey Player Misses Five Minutes Of Game Time With Broken Face, Returns In Time For Season-Losing Goal
Your morning roundup for May 29, the day after death told the world that the puffy-faced Grandma Bandit was actually a man....

This Memorial Day Weekend, Don't Forget To Prepare For The Penis Inspector
As far as we know, this isn't real. Carlmont High (Calif.) students don't have to "ensure that their penises are clean and orderly," nor do they have to procure a friend's pubes if they have trimmed their own. It's a senior prank, and a well-executed one at that....

The Greatest Baseball Highlight Ever Happened 20 Years Ago Tonight
The video's been played and replayed so many times, it almost no longer matters who and where and how. It's a dude running through a fence....

Cockblocked By The Mentally Disabled!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Horse Herpes Outbreak Forces Rodeo Queens To Ride Stick Ponies
Oh wait, I'm sorry, that's the actual headline that a Utah TV station went with for this story....

Mets Manager Just As Dumb As Mets Owners, Carlos Beltran Is His Whore
Any of you know what the hell this means? Backward, defeatist: these are your New York Mets, with their fearless skipper leading the charge....