the Page 920 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Baltimore Furry Commits Itself To Inspiring Marathoners
His name is Nate Sweeney. On days like today, when people run 26.2 miles through Baltimore, he dons a full-body tiger suit of synthetic fur and blasts Survivor....
Just A Warning To You Big Simpsons Fans Out There
An Idaho man pleaded guilty to downloading Simpsons porn. He faces 10 years in federal prison. His lawyer worked on contingency? No, money down!...
Funbag Bonus: Did The Chilean Miners Masturbate?
The Chilean miners were all rescued, free now to breathe in air and have their medical benefits cut off three weeks from now. But screw that: Wuz they jackin' it?...
Soccer Team Signs 11-Year-Old
Premier League champeens Chelsea have negotiated a £10,000 + add-ons deal to sign an 11-year-old striker from League Two club Northampton Town....
John Salley Story Corner: All Rub, No Tug From The Hotel Masseuse
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: when massages go technically right....
Blinded To The Other "Blind Sides"
There are dozens, if not hundreds of cases of white families taking in black athletes. Why don't their stories capture the imagination like Michael Lewis's tome did? America's Sweetheart Sandra Bullock, duh. [Slate]...
What They're Saying About Brett Favre's Penis Today
As the league's investigation rolls on, it's time for the media to hammer all the angles and the pundits to weigh in. Whose coverage hits it on the head, and whose comes up short?...
Police Find Serbia’s Infamous Masked Hooligan Hiding In Bus Luggage Compartment
By now we're sure you've already seen video of the hooligan-inspired trouble which forced Tuesday's Euro 2012 qualifier between Italy and Serbia to be called off after 7 minutes....
Horrible Spoof Video Faceoff: "Teach Me How To Bucky" vs. "Teach Me How To Duckie"
I can't even work up the energy to make snarky comments about either of these. I'll just leave them here, where hopefully, they'll never escape....
Lionel Messi’s Goals Look Just As Good Written Down
Here's the original version if you like your words to come with moving pictures....
What They're Saying About Brett Favre's Penis Today
At long last, the media has football-related Favre matters to write about. But did they cover his pick-6, or his pic-4"?...
Man Gets Full Football Jersey Tattoo To Honor Team Icon
The poor bastard in the chair is Felipe Alvarez, an Atletico Nacional supporter who has decided to pay homage to murdered club legend Andres Escobar by having a replica Atletico shirt tattooed across his torso, complete with Escobar's number on the back....
"Boom Goes The Dynamite" Kid Lands On His Feet
When we last checked in on Brian "No One Knows My Real Name" Collins, he was the victim of downsizing at a Waco TV station. Well, he's back, at the ABC affiliate in Alexandria, Minn. We wish him the best. [KSAX]...
The Onslaught Of Customized Favre Jerseys Begins
Brett Favre just threw his 500th and 501st career touchdowns....
Crazy Lady Elisabeth Hasselbeck Has Predictably Crazy Theory About Our Brett Favre Story
Barry mentioned this earlier, but here's video of Elisabeth Hasselbeck putting on her tin-foil hat and saying it's fishy that the Brett Favre story broke the week Favre was playing the Jets. It's the dumbest conspiracy theory Favre's junk has caused....
What They're Saying About Brett Favre's Penis Today
We're in full-on scandal mode now. Which media outlets have gone whole hog, and which have only gone sad, semi-flaccid hog? Here's your daily roundup of reactions....
The Carlton Dance Makes NFL Debut (Update)
Lions cornerback Alphonso Smith jumped this Sam Bradford pass and took it to the house, scoring six football points and infinity ridiculous dance points when he broke out everyone's favorite mid-'90s dance—"The Carlton Dance"—in the end zone....
Montenegro Striker Loses His Shorts In Goal Celebration
Montenegro met Switzerland in Euro 2012 qualifying on Friday with Roma striker Mirko Vucinic scoring the only goal of the game, a dinked 68' finish....
Liverpool FC Chairman Admires Winning Attitude Of The Boston Rod Sex
*Consults Freud textbooks*...
What They're Saying About Brett Favre's Penis Today
Certain outlets have taken this story and run with it; others have refused to touch it with a four-inch pole. Here's how the media is, erm, handling Brett Favre's junk....