uri Page 136 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Miami Heat Minority Owner Who Sued Google Because Of This Derpy Photo Is A Dick
The mug you see there belongs to Raanan Katz, minority owner of the Miami Heat, former Israeli basketball player, and real estate developer in Sunny Isles, Fla. He's into silly faces and frivolous lawsuits, and somehow he just got a court in Florida to walk all over the First Amendment....

Arsenal's Jack Wilshere Took A Studs-Up Boot To The Crotch Yesterday
Gunners star Jack Wilshere entered a world of pain yesterday in the first half of Arsenal's match at Reading, when Royals midfielder Jobi McAnuff delivered a boot square to Wilshere's balls....

An MMA Fighter Says He Tore His Dick While Having Sex
On Dec. 3, MMA fighter Ray Elbe says he suffered one of the worst injuries that can happen to any man. While having enthusiastic sex with his girlfriend, he claims to have torn his penis....

Bode Miller Accidentally Destroyed His Wife's Face With A Golf Ball
That butchered face you see there belongs to professional volleyball player Morgan (Beck) Miller, who happens to be the wife of Bode Miller, the alpine skiing Olympic gold medalist and world champion. Seems the Millers were out playing a little golf together yesterday. And we can safely conclude tha...

How Maurice Clarett Lost His Way, Bombed Out Of The NFL, Planned A Murder, Missed An Exit, And Found Himself (And Warren Buffett) In Prison
In 2009, Joe Moglia, then the CEO of TD Ameritrade, quit his job to coach football. He wanted to coach a college team. But no athletic director wanted him. So he took a job, in 2011, as head coach of the UFL's Omaha Nighthawks, a team that included former Buckeye Maurice Clarett. Moglia had an unort...

Hockey Player In UK Takes Skate To The Face And HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THAT HUGE CUT BELOW HIS NOSE
Craig Peacock is a 24-year-old forward for the Belfast Giants, a team in Northern Ireland that plays in the UK's Elite Ice Hockey League. We once showed you Peacock and the Giants lip-synching their way through a Mariah Carey Christmas number. But this here is far less joyous. Peacock took a skate t...

Eliminating Kickoffs Would Ruin Football, According To A Kicker And A Kick Return Specialist
Yesterday, we discussed the possibility that the NFL will do away with kickoffs and instead institute a punt-or-4th-and-long option. On its face, the idea seems logical, maybe even preferable, if not necessarily a top-priority reform. The NFL can frame it as an issue of player safety, but truthfully...

Ray Lewis Has A Terrifying New Facemask
Ray Lewis returned to practice Wednesday for the first time since tearing his tricep in Week 7. He's not eligible to play this Sunday, but the Ravens posted a photo of the new facemask Lewis will be wearing....

Chargers Games May Have Been Staffed With Illegal Child Labor
The Department of Labor is investigating whether the staffing company contracted to work Chargers games has been using unpaid high schoolers as security, ticket takers, and head coach....

After Injury, Soccer Player Now Has Too Many Knees
This is the leg of Celtic winger Kris Commons, a few hours after being fouled in a Champions League win over Spartak Moscow that sent Celtic through to the round of 16. It has too many bumps in it....
![The FBI Is Raiding The House Of Former NFL Tackle Jason Fabini [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/187jblu8tl7ckjpg.jpg)
The FBI Is Raiding The House Of Former NFL Tackle Jason Fabini [UPDATE]
We don’t know what goes on in Fort Wayne, Ind. We’ve never been there and have no desire to visit. But we do know that today, in Fort Wayne, local, state, and federal officials carried out a raid on two homes owned by longtime NFL offensive tackle Jason Fabini, who played for the Jets, Cowboys, and ...

Alex Rodriguez To Undergo Surgery On His Other Hip, Miss A Large Chunk Of Next Season
It was just three years ago that Alex Rodriguez had surgery on his right hip to repair a torn labrum. Now, multiple media outlets are reporting that A-Rod is set to have the same procedure done on his left hip. He reportedly hurt his hip towards the end of last season, slogged through his dismal po...

Four Hofstra Basketball Players Arrested For Allegedly Stealing Laptops, Phones, And iPads
Hofstra teams are called "the Pride." Today, eh, not so much. Four members of the basketball team—Shaquille Stokes, Kentrell Washington, Jimmy Hall, and Dallas Anglin—have been charged with running an electronics theft ring on campus....

Rhode Island's Football Stadium Started Blaring Hip Hop And Dubstep At 2 A.M. Last Night
Perhaps haunted by the ghosts of booty booty booty booty rockin' everywhere, Rhode Island's Meade Stadium came alive during the witching hour. According to Eric, the URI student who took this video, the music began blaring at 2 in the morning, featuring favorites like "Ms. Jackson," "21 Questions,...

Paul Posluszny Has The Face Of A Football Player
Despite losing a 43-37 overtime thriller to the Texans, Jacksonville Jaguars fans can find solace in a few positives from Sunday's game. First, they were part of the first overtime in NFL history to feature three separate scores, but more importantly linebacker Paul Posluszny emerged from a fumble ...

We've Probably Seen The Last Of Brandon Roy
After playing just five games in his comeback season with the Minnesota Timberwolves, Brandon Roy is scheduled to have yet another knee surgery. The seventh of his career. The Oregonian is reporting that Roy is scheduled to have arthroscopic surgery on his right knee later this week....

The Patriots Are Being Shady About Rob Gronkowski's Broken Arm
LeSean McCoy wasn't the only star player to get needlessly injured late in a blowout. Reports out of New England say Patriots TE Rob Gronkowski broke his arm late in the Patriots' 59-24 stomping of Indianapolis, and has already undergone surgery. He's expected to return in time for the playoffs....

Report: The NFL Made Disability Payments For Brain Trauma While Publicly Denying That Football Causes Brain Trauma
Officially, it was three years ago that the NFL first acknowledged that repeated concussions can indeed have a long-term effect on mental health. In the six years before that, the league had taken the opposite stance, publishing a series of scientific papers that denied any link between football and...

LeSean McCoy Gets Concussed, And It's All Andy Reid's Fault
If Andy Reid's out, he's taking as many players as he can with him. That's the only possible explanation for leaving his starters in until the very end of a blowout loss at Washington, a strategy that paid off with LeSean McCoy receiving a concussion at a time when he should have been on the bench, ...

Report: Andrew Bynum Hurt Himself While Bowling
Andrew Bynum will finally play for the 76ers when ... oh, who fucking knows? Bynum hasn't played or practiced this season because he and his haircut were traded to Philly this summer with chronic knee problems. The injury that had kept him sidelined was a bone bruise in his right knee, and Bynum has...