van Page 128 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Vonn Crashes (Again) And Other Things You Already Know, But NBC Will Pretend You Didn't: Open Thread
So that happened, but it's being shown again tonight on NBC, so feign appropriate levels of disappointment to give support to NBC's advertising sponsors. It's the least you can do....

Everyone Will See Live Hockey On Friday, NBC Says
From a memo just sent to NBC Uni staff: "The USA semifinal men's hockey game against the winner of the Czech Republic vs. Finland will be broadcast live in all time zones on NBC this Friday at 3 p.m. ET."...

Why Won't NBC Follow Its Own Advice On Live Broadcasts?
Don't read this post if you plan to watch the USA-Switzerland game at a time that is not when it's happening, which is now. Unless you want to stand around the Big Internet Twitter Cooler that all the kids love....

NBC's Olympic Coverage Gives Word To Your Mother
Joannie Rochette's teary-eyed ice skating routine almost short-circuited this morning's Sap-o-meter. Seven mentions of "mom" in one night ties a record for this year's Winter Games. 10 mentions of "mother" shatters the previous mark. [Slate]...

Last Night's Winner: Crybabies
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like people who watch the Olympics not for the speed and grace of finely-tuned athletes, but because they enjoy blubbering like little girls over figure skating....

Silver Medal Winners Just Miserable Bastards, Report Bored Scientists
I guess there's some truth to the phrase "second place is the first loser." Olympians have been shown to be much more satisfied with a bronze than a silver, even though it's clearly the Jan Brady of medals....

Howard Stern Prank Caller Fools ESPN
SportsCenter was so thrilled to get "Brian Westbrook" on the phone, they skipped a very important step: making sure it was actually Westbrook, and not a Stern disciple expressing his desire to worship Stern's prostate....

Blame Canada, Says Canada
Somebody's got to be the scapegoat for the host nation's disappointing medal count. The athletes, for not living up to expectations? The COC for setting unrealistic expectations? The fans for being too passionate? Bingo....

With One Raised Digit, Tom Brokaw Inadvertently Expresses NBC's Contempt For You: Open Thread
Here's Brokaw — NBC mascot, author of The Bestest Generation Ever, bewildered old man who occasionally wanders onto the Olympics set — gesturing during a fireside après-ski. Perfect. The network is basically an old guy giving you the finger, anyway....

NBC To West Coast Hockey Fans: "Kiss Our Moose!"
Ready for some fresh NBC outrage? Just wait until tomorrow, when Oregon discovers that the broadcast for USA Hockey's quarterfinal doesn't start until three hours after the actual game does. I understand hockey really comes to life on the radio....

Dilemma: Why Can't Ski Jumping Be More Dangerous?
In the era of murderous luge runs and five-story mogul jumps, putting waxed floorboards on your feet and throwing yourself off a mountain just isn't what it used to be. Where have you gone, Vinko Bogataj? [NY Times/Pat's Papers]...

Last Night's Winner: Dance! Dance! Dance!
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like fans of competitive ice dancing, otherwise known as people who enjoy Linkin Park, uncomfortable sibling romance and the Holocaust. The Olympics have something for everyone!...

Everything Tiger Woods Does Is Funnier In Retrospect
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Locker Room Boxing May Be Leading To Canada's Hockey Downfall
A shocking exposé by the Toronto Star has revealed a dark secret of Canadian youth hockey—twisted teenage Fight Clubs organized in team locker rooms. It also revealed another secret: This happens all time and no one cares....

Lindsey Vonn Has Not Yet Found Room In Her Heart To Believe In Tiger Woods Again
Of the people who hugged Tiger after his statement last week, Vonn says: "They're like, 'Yeah, you're awesome, you go have that sex.'" [Time, via]...

The Olympics Have Daddy Issues
Slate's Sap-o-Meter reports: "Cumulatively, the words father, dad, and son were uttered a staggering 47 times between Friday and Sunday," largely on the strength of an Apolo Ohno feature. The Winter Olympics are the new baseball. [Slate]...

Boorish Americans Win The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like obnoxious United Statesians who are now free to gloat over their nation's Olympic triumphs as exultant underdogs instead of domineering bullies. Suck it, Earth!...

Great Spirit, Wrong Olympics
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Best In The World? Not Even Best In Northern Minnesota
This explains everything. Our men's curling team managed to lose their most recent Tuesday night league game at the Duluth Curling Club. To be fair, it is the place to be on Tuesday nights in Duluth. [NY Times]...

Boorish Canadians Make Our Favorite Curler Cry
The host nation's medal count is always higher than normal for a reason: the screaming crowds that psych up the natives, and psych out the visitors. But now they've gone too far; they've made Maddy cry....