World Cup Page 84 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
English-American Alliance To Be Torn Asunder By Soccer
World Cup 2010 is going to be the Revolution and 1812 rolled into one and deep fried, only like....10,000 times more awesomer. Uncle Sam should lend-lease England a couple extra butts, so there's even more limey arse to kick!...
2010 Fifa World Cup Draw
For those who want to see foreign people fill-in brackets on a board, go to these fine places for live-blog updates....
Is The Big Ten The Best Hoops Conference?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Maradona Tells His Critics To "Suck It", Also "Keep On Sucking it"
Argentina's greatest soccer hero has caught a lot of flack since taking over the national team and leading them almost nowhere. But after dramatically securing a last-minute World Cup berth, he let loose with an epic kiss-my-ass tirade....
Your U.S.A. vs. Mexico Open Live Thread Thingy
Fire up, gringos! It's like the original Mexican-American War, only with less malaria. The winner gets to punch Lou Dobbs in the face; loser gets to keep Texas. Olé your brains out in comments....
The Tiny Plastic Horn That Will Ruin The World Cup
If you've watched the Confederations Cup, you have no doubt been annoyed by the mysterious buzzing sound that drowns out even the TV announcers. Well, get used to it, because that sound will haunt you throughout next year's World Cup....
How Do Iranian Soccer Players Protest? Very Carefully
Iran's soccer team may have found it difficult to concentrate on their World Cup qualifying match in South Korea today, since their country is, you know, engulfed in the cleansing flames of democratic awakening....
No, I Give YOU The Yellow Card!
There has to be some way to get Andre Luis to the U.S., get him in a Dallas Cowboys ... or better yet, Cincinnati Bengals, uniform, and sit back and watch the fun. Here's my favorite video of the week so far, which shows the Botafogo defender objecting to receiving a yellow card in the Copa Sudameri...
The Church Of Maradona Makes Baby Jesus Cry
Most often-asked question by first-time visitors to the Church of Maradona: Is that a soccer ball with a crown of thorns? Why yes, it is. This holy procession honoring the Argentine soccer great also includes a replica World Cup trophy and a church with a tiny soccer ball steeple bell. No way this c...
Meet Argentina's New National Soccer Coach (Burp!)
I see no possible way this ends badly. Argentina, which has been sent home ignominiously from the past four World Cup soccer tournaments, has turned to its largest celebrity in terms of land mass to return the nation to its glorious past. Diego Maradona, considered by many to be the greatest soccer ...
England, Where You Can't Wear a Mankini and People Cry When They Get Booed
Michael Bertin writes about soccer regularly for Deadspin. Ashley Cole—that's him in the white—seemingly has plenty going for him. He's relatively young (27), he's got a hot plastic wife, and he gets compensated handsomely to do his job, which is a pretty sweet one as he plays left back for Chelsea...
World Cup 2010: South Africa's Plans to Legalize Prostitution Scrutinized
When are John McCain and Barack Obama going to step up to the plate and demand legalization for the Super Bowl? Pansies, I tell you, each of them. The South African plan would only legalize prostitution for the length of the World Cup and then the laws would return to normal. Just like the marriages...
When They Think About You ...
Last year, MJD told you about the special World Cup vibrators named after German "stars" Michael Ballack and Oliver Kahn, which promised to make women feel "'like you've won the world cup of sex," which hopefully doesn't involve a head butt....
Hey, How Come All We Got Was A Team Ghana Keychain?
German hospitals are reporting a huge upsurge in maternity reservations for the month of April, which happens to be nine months after the 2006 World Cup was hosted in that country. Give us a minute while we figure out what's going on....
Smiles, Everyone! Smiles!
As we mentioned Tuesday, FIFA president Sepp Bladder wants to get Marco Materazzi and Zinedine Zidane together on an island for a final reconcilliation concerning the infamous World Cup head-butting incident. But after a full 24 hours of being mocked by the British tabloids, this crackpot scheme may...
Hirshey Quickie: And Just For Kicks, Bring Your Sister
David Hirshey writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin....
Some Things You Hear That You Can't Unhear
We just don't get the French. The fastest-selling song in France, nay, in all of Europe, is Coup de Boule (The Headbutt), which was produced as a "joke" by a couple of music producers in Paris to ease the pain of their country's World Cup loss to Italy. But now France's loss is also our loss, as thi...
Well Worth Losing The World Cup
Want to know why alleged Brazilian superstar Ronaldinho struggled so much during the World Cup? It wasn't the world-class competition, the pressure of the international stage or being hypnotized by teammate Ronaldo's gut. It was orgasms and video games....
Not The Best Way To Protect Valuables
There's no way of verifying whether or not this is real — our spider senses say no — but even if it's not, it's something we've all been afraid of. A German fan on his way to the World Cup, showing off his tickets to a fellow traveler, has a serious mishap....
The Headbutt That Will Not Die
If you're tired of hearing about the Zidane World Cup headbutt (or, the "Glasgow Handshake," as such a move is more commonly called), well, sorry. Even as you read this, an army of computer nerds are producing animated gifs of the incident at alarming rates. The French have their version of the co...