The Breakfast Of World F#@*ing Champions

• What's this green stuff in my cereal?: Why isn't there a Philadelphia Phillies Wheaties Box? Because it's not a complete breakfast without Whiz. [ Home Run Derby]

• F- in the A-: You know where you can say fucking? Where ever Lance Armstrong is. (You just can't write it down.) [ Examiner]

• Tell me lies: The Nationals finally figure out how to get top-tier sluggers to come to Washington. Now if they could just get some pitchers charged with contempt of Congress. [ Nationals Enquirer]

• Ha-ha: Do you want to see video of Vince Carter looking foolish on the basketball court? Of course you do. [ NESW]

• Manny is fundamental: I hear the authorized Manny Ramirez biography starts off great, then you'll probably lose interest about half way through, but the best chapter is the last one. Oh, and it's a great weapon for hitting old men in the head. [ Sox and Dawgs]