To Watch Tonight

What to watch as you remind yourself to tuck in your penis before playing Texas A&M ... • Boxing: Vic Darchinyan vs. Diosdado Gabi, for IBF flyweight championship; lightweights, Anthony Mora vs. Rustam Nugaev, at Santa Ynez, Calif. Yeah, well maybe we could enjoy this fight if Al Bernstein weren't constantly asking us to go to the snack bar for him. [ Showtime] • MLB: Preseason, Los Angeles Dodgers vs. Atlanta, at Lake Buena Vista, Fla. Hello baseball, we've been waiting for you. Here, enjoy these snacks we've prepared. [ ESPN] • NBA: Washington at Philadelphia, Los Angeles Clippers at Utah. No, Iverson's not bitter over the Olympic snub (glass shatters in his hand). Not one bit (snaps arm off of armchair). [ ESPN]