Today In The Premiership...

Fulham 0-4 Arsenal. The Gunners threw an old-school beatdown on Fulham, getting two goals from Thierry Henry, and outplaying Fulham in every possible way. Arsenal plays Real Madrid on Wednesday, and I'm definitely watching that. If it's on TV. And it doesn't conflict with the Big East tournament.

West Brom 1-2 Chelsea. Chelsea was lifeless in the first half, played most of the second half with ten men, and still beat West Brom. It was manager Jose Mourinho's 100th match as Chelsea's manager. Hooray for him.

Liverpool 0-0 Charlton. Charlton manages a tie against Liverpool because the Reds couldn't score with a homeless hooker if they had a pocketful of cash. Charlton goalie Thomas Myhre was outstanding, and Liverpool squandered a lot of opportunities.

West Ham 2-2 Everton. The Hammers (I love that nickname) were looking for their sixth straight Premiership win, but were denied by a late James Beattie goal for Everton. Dean Ashton scored for West Ham, and then, as pictured, was required to give two people a piggyback ride.