Screenshot: Deadspin

Fried chicken aficionado and horse-sports enthusiast Hannah Keyser, feared equally by ignorant sports fans and by baseball players who can’t play board games, will be departing Deadspin for free agency. Previously under contract to the Philadelphia Phillies, Keyser’s tenure at the site was marked by among other things a careful attention to life on the margins of pro sports, tall boots, questionable film takes, and an unrivaled ability to trick her colleagues into making idiots of themselves on camera. While we will miss her terribly, Keith Hernandez’s phone is now that much closer to being safe.