Come Gather Round, Children

Well, this should be awfully entertaining: It's the Terrell Owens Youth Football Camp!

Youth ages 7-17 will get to learn first hand from Terrell as well as active and retired players the fundamentals and special techniques of the sport. They will learn how to enhance their skills and make new friends.

Now.

Let's set aside, for a moment, the rather brilliant tactical maneuver of repurposing T.O.'s famous mocking of the Cowboy star into an image that signifies triumph. We're just trying to imagine some of the seminars the camp will offer.

• A Nickel For Two Dimes: The Art Of Contract Negotiation • Troubles With Teammates? Fuck 'Em! • You Won't Believe The Shit People Will Buy • Don't You Worry: Ain't Nobody Gonna Understand You Anyway • How To Properly Imply The Homosexuality Of Your Quarterback

All yours, kids, for only $195! Go bug your parents right now!

Terrell Owens Youth Football Camp [TerrellOwens.com]