Locker Page 665 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Bird Released Into Wild, Flies Directly Into Glass Wall, Likely Perishes
Oh noooooooo my God...
Who's Funding Kevin Johnson's Secret Government?
It isn’t hard to see why nothing bad has ever quite touched Kevin Johnson, mayor of Sacramento, Calif., even as he’s authored a long series of lurid sex and corruption scandals, any one of which would have ended the career of a less fortunate man....
Tell Us About A Time You Pissed Yourself
You may have a story about that one time you peed all over yourself. If you don’t, you likely have a story about that one time your buddy peed all over himself. We want to hear those stories. ...
Marco Rubio's Boy Kinda Punched Rand Paul's Boy In The Face Last Night
Politics, like rap music, is sports. In the throes of competition, tempers flare as the blood gets hot. There’s always some beef. Sometimes, separate parties arrive at blows. Rarely, there’s even gunplay. Within that context, allow us to direct you to the bestest beef of them all, between aides to R...
The Caucasian's Guide To Black Barbecues
As interracial dating, integration, and cross-cultural friendships increase, many people find themselves attending events in which they are the minority, and have no frame of reference from which to base their etiquette. In an effort to help bridge the cultural gaps we all have to traverse at some p...
Dissolve The United States
They are all insane people. Even poor, stressed-out, occasionally lucid-seeming John Kasich: bonkers. Pathology is contextual, and one simply does not bring reasonable takes like Actually, the deal with Iran is okay, provided we do the diligence of enforcing it, just like pretty much every other dea...
Deadspin Up All Night: Keep In Touch With Me
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. It’s still technically summer. ...
How To Eat At A Fancy Restaurant
At some point in your life, you’ll have to eat at a dining establishment where there are more forks on your table then there are ties in your closet. It’s a daunting prospect, but just roll with it. You’ll be fine. We made this video to be your guide. ...
<i>First Blood </i>Is A Darker, Sadder, And Better Rambo Flick Than You Remember
The climax of 1982’s First Blood isn’t a gun battle or a knife fight. It’s Sylvester Stallone, as John Rambo, breaking down into big, blubbery tears, trying to make sense of the world around him. He’s learned that he’s the last surviving member of his elite fighting force, that America has no furthe...
How To Clean An Extra-Foul Bathroom
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She’ll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....
Why Trent Dilfer Was The Worst Color Man In History
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....
<i>Black Mass </i>Plays Like A Boston-Mob-Thriller Parody
1. Whatever your thoughts on The Departed or The Town—the modern Boston mob/crime thrillers that all modern Boston mob/crime thrillers are measured against—it is undeniable that everyone involved was deeply invested in both. Matt Damon had been waiting his whole life to play a character like his Dep...
How To Make Your Relationship Non-Monogamous
There comes a time in the course of many romantic relationships when one party feels strongly compelled to have sex with someone other than their beloved. It is, dare I say, normal. Ideally, all adults have practice controlling their impulses, so it’s not the end of the world to occasionally commit ...
Welcome To Deadspin's Republican Debate Liveblog
Tonight’s Republican presidential debate takes place at the Ronald Reagan Library, where the top 11 candidates will discuss foreign policy, domestic issues, and probably Ahmed Mohamed, the Muslim teenager who was arrested for bringing his homemade clock to school earlier this week. Loony-toon Donald...
Deadspin Up All Night: It's Almost Funny
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. I’m out of my mind. ...
Ta-Nehisi Coates Needs An Editor, Says Editor Who Edited Like One Blog Post In 18 Months
Earlier this week, Atlantic writer Ta-Nehisi Coates published an enormous study of mass incarceration and its impact on African-American families in America today. The article is comprehensive, exhaustive, compellingly written, and reaches back into centuries of American oppression to come to the co...
Don't Laugh: Metta World Peace Can Help The Lakers
News surfaced last week that Metta World Peace had been working out at the Lakers practice facility and was getting close to a one-year deal with the team. Let Woj tell it. “Inching closer”/“an increasing expectation,” la di da. The important part is holy shit the Lakers might sign Metta World Peace...
Classic Man: "Don't Mess With A Bear"
Frequently in this space, we will consult a different entry in the 1987 book The Modern Man’s Guide to Life to see how the advice therein has aged. On Monday, we touched on how to deal with going bald; today, we’re talking bear alarms....
How To Answer The Phone
Your phone rings. It isn’t one of the two people you talk to regularly, but also doesn’t appear to be a bill collector. And you, you’ve been answering the phone the same way since you were 12. Get yourself together. ...
James Harden's Drunk As Hell And Yelling About Adidas
Rockets shooting guard James Harden was spotted leaving a Manhattan club early this morning, clearly overjoyed as he sang a line from Travis Scott’s “Antidote.” The guy taking video for TMZ asked Harden, who signed a 13-year contract with Adidas in August, if the shoe company was still mad at him fo...