Morning Blogdome: One Red Card, Please

• All is forgiven: Dutch footie pro Rafael Van der Vaart got himself intentionally disqualified from a match last year just so that he could go to his wife's birthday party. The woman in the picture here—that's his wife. You're lucky he didn't cut his own foot off to stay home with her. [ Dirty Tackle]

• Step three: Profit: How to make touchdown celebrations more interesting. Step one: Score a freaking touchdown already. [ Money Shot]

• Dude, how high are you?: Lunatic skier accidentally sets a world record by skiing off a 107-meter cliff (that's about 350 feet) and not dying. He's like the Plaxico Burress of downhill. [ Homeboy Ski]

• That's a lot, right?: The Raptors fire coach Sam Mitchell after his team loses by ... (checks calculator) ... 39 points. Relax, Tom Izzo. [ Inside Hoops]

• This is still a blog: The Tampa Bay Rays are hiring. Can you do a belly-wiggle? Wait, look who I'm talking to.... [ Rays Index]