New York City Nightclub DJs Will Not Stop Tormenting Kris Humphries

This story from the New York Daily News' gossip blog would make you feel bad for Kris Humphries if there wasn't something so undeniably hateable about him (it's mostly his face). Apparently, Humphries was trolled by two DJs at an NYC night club (the same one in which Tony Parker got his eye gouged during the Drake-Chris Brown melee) this Wednesday when they wouldn't stop playing Kanye West songs. In case you weren't aware, West is currently humping Kim Kardashian, the living RealDoll that Humphries was once married to for 72 days.

Humphries' anguish was apparent Wednesday night at WIP, when he arrived to let off steam after a tough loss to the Knicks, but was left fuming after consecutive West songs blared in his ears.

"He was trying to talk to every girl in there and was getting turned down by every girl he spoke to," an eyewitness tells Confidenti@l's Marianne Garvey.

Our source, who watched Humphries foul out until 4 a.m., says deejays Chuck Barrett and Scram Jones played a list of West's tunes, and by the time they got to "Mercy" and "Clique," Humph was on fire.

Burn! But Humphries wasn't just going to take that shit laying down. Seeking revenge, he sprung into action in hilariously impotent fashion:

"He took a bottle of Patron that he didn't pay for, put it in front of his crotch and dumped the entire thing on the floor, because he was wasted and tired of Kanye songs," says the source. "Not only was he acting like he was peeing the bottle out, he insisted on staying."

You've been put on notice, New York City DJs. You mess with Hump, and Hump will pretend to piss Patron all over the floor of the club. You don't want any of that.

[ NYDN]