g Page 5619 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
When They Think About You ...
Last year, MJD told you about the special World Cup vibrators named after German "stars" Michael Ballack and Oliver Kahn, which promised to make women feel "'like you've won the world cup of sex," which hopefully doesn't involve a head butt....
Apparently, The Warriors Can Lose At Home
In their their preview of the Suns-Spurs series, Free Darko, describing Stephen Jackson and the Golden State Warriors, wrote, "Stephen Jackson doesn't care because he has nothing to lose, and thus is invincible." For the first time, last night, his team looked like it cared, like it had a lot to los...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while tripping on peyote at the roulette table with your dead nephew's Vegas hooker. ... • NBA: Down go the Warriors! Utah 115, Golden State 101. • Golf: So out ... crooked baseball caps. So in ... Phil Mickelson golf visors. • MLB: Rockies caught in a vicious cycle thanks to Giants,...
To Watch Tonight...
• 8:00, ESPN. MLB. Detroit Tigers @ Minnesota Twins. A guy named Boof should have a giant red afro, or a curly mustache or something. • 8:00, Comedy Central. Movie. Bad Santa. Underrated in my view, but cursing at children makes me laugh. Don't judge me. • 9:30, TNT. NBA Playoffs. Utah Jazz @ Golden...
The Bulls Aren't Castrated Quite Yet
The Pistons got a little cocky after Game 3, when they took two quarters off, and then still managed to rout the Bulls. They tried the same routine today, but extended it to three quarters, even going so far as to put up a 13-point third quarter and go down by 20. But they couldn't make quite enough...
Brett Favre Threatens To Leave His Kingdom
• Brett Favre asked the Packers to trade him after the draft, then changed his mind. [FOX Sports] • Reggie Bush, putting it down on Kim Kardashian. [The Big Lead] • The Jazz refuse t-shirts to the brokest of their fans. [Shakedown Sports] • Checking in with the security guard at the club where Pac-M...
Alex Rodriguez, Amateur Urologist
Not to be outdone by the Brewers and their rectal exams, Alex Rodriguez appears to have decided to give Yankees pitcher Chien-Ming Wang a free urological exam in the middle of the game....
Tedy Bruschi's Going To Want To Try This Out Now
You know, a lot of people express concern about our nation's youth. But I say, when you've got a 13-year-old boy, smiling so broadly in front of a football star that he just tricked into throwing up the shocker ... I think the future's in good hands....
For Your Sunday Afternoon Viewing Pleasure...
12:00, ESPN2. IndyCar Racing. Indianapolis 500 Time Trials. 12:00, ESPNU. College Lacrosse. Georgetown vs. Princeton. 1:00, ESPN Classic. American Gladiators. 7 consecutive episodes. 1:30, TBS. MLB. Atlanta Braves @ Pittsburgh Pirates. 2:00, NBC. PGA Golf. The Players Championship, Final Round. 2:00...
About Last Night...
• NBA Playoffs. Nets 96, Cavaliers 85. See Nets, you are allowed to rebound. • NHL Playoffs. Senators 4, Sabres 3. It was only a time before Joe Corvo left his imprint on this series. • NBA Playoffs. Spurs 108, Suns 101. The one time somebody does clock Manu Ginobili in the eye, he doesn't get the c...
The Iron Sheik Is A Charming Man
I had no idea there were that many no-good motherfuckers in the world. I'm not sure, because I can't understand everything he's saying, but ... I think The Sheik even finds time to Barry Bonds a no-good motherfucker. It's at about the 1:33 mark, before says, "Tito Santana is a Mexican. He's OK. Bett...
Cooter Continues To Be Plentiful In Tennessee
• Stoned police officer asks 911 operator to confirm that the Red Wings are actually winning, and he is not suffering a hallucination. [freep.com] • Jim Bob Cooter, staying a Vol! [EDSBS] • Rick Reilly, wishing he had a lighter work schedule. [A Pudge is a Sandwich] • Ken Griffey Jr. moves into 6th ...
Michael Vick, Somehow, With Even Less Credibility
The hole that Michael Vick is in keeps getting bigger and bigger, like an infected puncture wound on the muscular neck of a not-quite-ferocious enough pitbull....
Don't Forget To Call Your Pulling Guard Tomorrow
Speaking at the Wisconsin Republican Party convention, Senator Sam Brownback thought he'd use a football analogy to stress the importance of rebuilding families. What he failed to realize, though, is that in Wisconsin, family is not important. Brett Favre is important....
Paul Azinger Demands The Protection Of Shrubbery
Because it's been far too long since we checked in with the "official blog of GCSAA's Golf Course Management magazine," let's do so now. They decided to follow Fred Klauk, the head superintendent at Sawgrass, around for the day....
Baron Davis Climbs Andrei Kirilenko
If you watch closely, you can see Andrei Kirilenko looking back at Baron Davis afterwards, as if to say, "You know, that really wasn't necessary." Even Adonal Foyle crinkled up his nose in a "Damn that was nasty," kind of a way. When Adonal Foyle acknowledges the nastiness, you know things just got ...
For Your Saturday Afternoon Viewing Pleasure...
1:00, NFL Network. NFL Europa Football. Frankfurt Galazy @ Rhein Fire. 2:00, NBC. PGA Golf. The Players Championship, Third Round. 2:00, ESPN2. LPGA Golf. Michelob Ultra Open, Third Round. 3:00, ABC. IndyCar Racing. Indianapolis 500 Qualifying, Pole Day. 3:30, Fox Soccer. MLS. Chicago Fire @ Toronto...
About Last Night...
• NBA. Golden State 125, Utah 105. In case you were wondering if the people in Golden State still believed, their t-shirts indicated that they do. They lose points for using Thunder Stix last night. Disgraceful. • NHL. Red Wings 2, Ducks 1. The Red Wings are far superior to the Ducks in the area of ...
What Will Be The Next Health-Oriented Ballpark Promotion?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
Those Cheating Spurs
• We're not sure Amare is helping himself out much here. [Signal To Noise] • Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s mom doesn't need her son to drive anymore, nope. [A Pudge Is A Sandwich] • The Royals fans are starting to crack. [Royals Review] • Some fun anti-Michael Kay rants. [Muting Michael Kay] • All you don't ...