ing Page 1701 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Trophy Monstrosity
Via TrojanWire and Every Day Should Be Saturday, we present the trophy given to the winner of the Fiesta Bowl this year. That's really it. This isn't actual size, but oh, if it were....

They Must Draw 6,000 Fans, Or God Will Call Them Home
So we were watching the Illini's 89-64 victory over Southeast Missouri State last night — we have the ESPN Full Court package; you honestly do not want to know how much money we give that network — and when it was over, we flipped around the other games. It was a bad Full Court night; nothing but ...

Blogdom's Best: Hating The Red Wings
Imagine the most hateful sports fans you can think of, stuck indoors because of the frigid weather, allowing their fury to boil. Now give them large sticks. That's your typical NHL fan, just looking for a reason to hate the opposing team. Throw in that whole Canada-USA rivalry thing, and you've go...

Fun With Strange Holiday Videos
Since, like us, you're probably kind of grumpy about having to work today, we invite you to enjoy two videos that are all full of holiday goodness....

Elsewhere...
• College Basketball: Detroit 48, Louisville 56. "I'm not pleased with our improvement," Louisville head coach Rick Pitino said after the game. Hey, ya think? Meanwhile, this may be the best thing to happen to Detroit basketball since Dick Vitale left to take an NBA job in 1978. • Rugby: Stade Fra...

Portis Now Getting Costume From Garage Sales
Just for the record, yesterday Redskins running back Clinton Portis wore a old leather football helmet, pigtails and Groucho Marx glasses. He called himself "Inspector Two Two." We have no idea what any of this means anymore. At this point, he's just cleaning out the neighbor's closet. In the fin...

A Chesnning Boat Trip
This is cheap, but come on, who cares, you know? We just can't resist a good Chesnning story....

End Of Days For Quin Snyder
Well, OK, we're back in brittle, frighteningly cold South Central Illinois right now — where, unlike, New York, we at least didn't have to walk to work — and we watched that Illini destruction of Missouri last night. It was so brutal that we took less joy in the victory than sympathy for Missouri,...

Back Home For Braggin' Rights
Every family has its tradition over the holidays, and this is ours: We go back to our hometown of Mattoon, Illinois to watch the annual Busch Braggin' Rights college basketball game between our beloved Illini and the Missouri Tigers. It might seem silly to those weaned on the opposite coasts, but ...

We're Going To Resist A "Giving Him Blue Balls" Joke
See that? That's a Christmas ornament as designed by Colts quarterback Peyton Manning for the Alive Hospice. It's kind of cute, a hand-drawn little angel. Other ornaments featured on the site include designs by Amy Grant, LeAnn Rimes, Tennessee governor Phil Bredesen and, yes, country music croone...

You're Doing A Heckuva Job, Ticey
Imagine, if you will, Ron Artest blasting fans for getting in fights, or Damon Stoudamire organizing a protest against High Times, or Fred Smoot screaming at those who would use contraptions to "please" two women who happened to be lying prostrate on the deck of a boat. Hypothetically speaking....

Fred Smoot Is Depressed
Well, here's a surprise: Vikings cornerback Fred Smoot has had a little different first year with the Vikings than he initially thought he would. (Not to be crude, but, uh, "holding a double-headed dildo and moving the dildo while each end was inserted into the vagina of two women" is a phrase tha...

How 'Bout That Darrell Armstrong?!
We've always wondered what would happen if we ended up a semi-prominent public figure in, say, Chicago, or Iowa City, Iowa. As lifelong Cardinals and Illini boosters, it would be impossible for us to hide our loyalties; we couldn't pretend to root for the Cubs or the Hawkeyes even if our livelihoo...

The Vikings Meet The Seventh Floor Crew
Sometimes, someone comes up with a concept that's so perfectly in our sweet spot that we can merely stand up and salute, and that's really saying something, because we spend the whole day on our ass....

Boxing's Sad March to Oblivion
We have to admit we were a bit intrigued by the boxing headline this morning, "Angry Ruiz wants rematch after losing to giant." (Made us skip right over the "Centaur wins fifth race at Pimlico" story). It turns out that, indeed, American John Ruiz lost by decision to 7-foot Russian Nikolay Valuev ...

Clearing The 4 o'clock Table...
• Cleveland 9, Oakland 7. If you watched this one, you're a diehard Browns fan, a diehard Raiders fan, or a person with severe emotional problems, and I'm worried about you. Let's get you some help. • Bengals 41, Detroit 17. Even Chad Johnson knows that it's bad form to celebrate the mundane accom...

The Severe Beating of the Dallas Cowboys
The Redskins are beating the Cowboys in just about every possible way that a team can be beaten. You have to wonder how all of our lives would be different if more of the original cowboy vs. Native American matchups had gone this way in the early history of our nation....

So, A Bit Of A Correction...
This is the first correction I've had to post here. It's a little bit of a landmark for me, so I'm kind of proud, though it's probably best if it doesn't become a trend....

Clearing The 1 o'clock Table...
• Chargers 26, Colts 17. This advice may be a little late, but I really think Tony Dungy should've rested people this week. • Pittsburgh 18, Minnesota 3. Pretty poor performance at home today by the Vikings, especially in a game they needed. They went down like Bryant McKinnie. • Seahawks 28, Titans...

Setting the 4 o'clock Table...
• Dallas @ Washington. I think you'll want to watch this one when you see your other two options below... • Cincinnati @ Detroit. Because someone needs to prove to Matt Millen that is is possible to resurrect a moribund franchise. • Cleveland @ Oakland. There are only 3 games at 4 o'clock today, whi...