ns Page 1727 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ladies, Buy Your Pink Ray Rice Jerseys Today!
Hey, ladies: get ready for the upcoming NFL season with your special Ray Rice jerseys, still in stock on NFL.com. Act fast, though; these won't be around for long!...
NFL Network On Ray Rice Suspension: "The Iron Fist Of The NFL"
Nearly every sane sports fan is offended by the leniency of Ray Rice's two-game NFL suspension for domestic abuse, but don't let anyone at NFL Network know that. They described the suspension today as "dealing with the iron fist of the NFL."...
Reports: Ray Rice Suspended Two Games For Knocking Out Fiancée
As first reported by Yahoo's Rand Getlin, and just now by multiple other reporters, Ravens RB Ray Rice will be suspended by the NFL for the first two games of the season for beating the shit out of his then-fiancée....
Asshole Cannot Find Pen, Writes Entire <em>NYT</em> Trend Piece About It
Even by the standards of fake trend pieces in the The New York Times, today's column in about "The Demise of the Pen" in—where else?—the fashion and style section is exceptionally breathtaking in its presumptuousness. Join me now and marvel as writerer Nick Bilton turns a moment of sheer banality i...
It's Time Again To Enjoy Miserable Phillies Fans In Extreme Slow Motion
Jonathan Papelbon shit the bed again tonight, earning another loss and blowing his second game in as many days. A while back, we presented some Phillies fans watching the game slip away in extreme slow motion . You seemed to like it, so we did it again tonight....
Jay Cutler Drove To Camp In A Big-Ass Van, Is Still The Best
Jay Cutler showed up to Bears training camp today driving the vehicle you see above, what Jay calls a conversion van. Cutler made it very clear that this was not a mini-van, probably because he has spawned a whole brood of mini-Cutlers and a mini-van seems like a pretty sensible option for a dad...
Tennis Writer Neil Harman Is Guilty Of Weapons-Grade Plagiarism
Earlier today, we told you about tennis writer Neil Harman admitting that at least some portion of the official Wimbledon yearbook he publishes every year was plagiarized. The full breadth of The Times of London's chief tennis correspondent's plagiarism is now beginning to come into focus, thanks to...
Ruben Tejada Leaves Game After Taking Fastball To The Skull
Ruben Tejada left today's Mets-Mariners game in Seattle after being hit in the head by a 93 mph fastball from Taijuan Walker. ...
Fred Davis Allegedly Criticizes Woman's Ass, Throws Dirt At Her
Former Skins tight end Fred Davis had a horrible February, but his year seems to be getting worse. A woman filed a complaint saying that on June 2, Davis harassed her while she was out with a friend at a diner. D.C. police now have a warrant out for him....
Hockey's About To Get The Bullshit "Anti-Concussion Helmet" Treatment
Virginia Tech thinks hockey helmets are bullshit, which is more or less true. In turn, it wants to look at the differences between hockey's helmets and football's recently evolved versions, and bring the concussion-stopping advances to hockey. This is pretty much bullshit. ...
Respected Tennis Writer Cops To Plagiarism; There's Likely More To Find
Neil Harman has been The Times of London's chief tennis correspondent since 2002, during which time he has been awarded the Sports Journalist Association's "Sports News Reporter of the Year" award, as well as the ATP's Ron Bookman Award for Media Excellence. He is also, as he admitted in a letter ...
Bills WR Sammy Watkins Trips, Recovers, Makes Terrific One-Handed Catch
There aren't many interesting happenings in the training camp period of the NFL season, but Sammy Watkins's catch in practice today is a nice little highlight....
Audubon Society Calls New Vikings Stadium "A Death Trap" For Birds
One of the more distinguishing features of the new Vikings stadium, set to open in 2016, is the huge glass exterior. But birds, who are stupid, would not call that a selling point. They would call it a dying point....
Idiot's Apology To Erin Andrews: "15 Lbs. Heavier, She'd Be A Waitress"
WEEI/NESN personality Kirk Minihane apologized on-air today for calling Erin Andrews a "gutless bitch," only to immediately follow it up with the assertion that "if she weighed 15 pounds more, she'd be a waitress at Perkins."...
Seahawks Mascot Stutter-Steps, 49ers Fan Falls Like A Sack Of Potatoes
The bounce. The bounce is what makes this particularly humiliating for the San Francisco fan and absolutely wonderful for the rest of us. That it comes as he tries to adjust his pants while a furry mascot crosses him up is but a delicious, added bonus. ...
This Is A Browns Fan Pissing On Art Modell's Grave
How do you turn Art Modell into a sympathetic figure? You don an Ed Reed Ravens jersey (to fool people who might find a dude in a Browns jersey visiting Art Modell's grave suspicious, natch), hold your pee for a while, get yourself a catheter, and then dramatically reveal your hidden Lyle Alzado jer...
Drowsy Baby Too Tired To Watch Blue Jays Get Blown Out
It's OK, little Blue Jays baby. We understand if you're tuckered out. You had an exhausting day that presumably included eating, keeping your head upright, and screaming. Besides, the Blue Jays aren't going to pull off a 13-run comeback. It's the eighth inning. Go to sleep....
The Top 200 Ways Bleacher Report Screwed Me Over
A month before I turned 21, I returned home from the Bay Area, where I was attending college, to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family in Minnesota. On a Tuesday evening, I was sitting in the living room, about to head upstairs to go to bed, when my phone buzzed with a text from Dave Finocchio, fo...
How To Legitimize Bigotry: Embrace Debate
This morning, Stephen A. Smith and Skip Bayless shouted at each other about Tony Dungy's comments that Michael Sam's sexuality would be an overriding distraction in an NFL locker room, and whether it was a bigger distraction that Michael Vick's return from prison. I'm sorry, that's the worst sente...
Man Who Helped Kill Women's Pro Soccer Dies While Playing Soccer
Early this morning rumors began to swirl that Dan Borislow, the millionaire entrepreneur whose legal war with Women's Professional Soccer was instrumental in bringing about the league's demise, had died at the age of 52. Bloomberg has since confirmed that Borislow died last night of a heart attack a...