soccer Page 297 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Weekend At Barclay's
• Don't Tread What you see above are the highlights of that Tottenham/Fulham 3-3 tie that I mentioned last night. In case you couldn't tell that was the great Clint Dempsey setting up two of Fulham's goals. He was the man down on the ground who kept the ball alive for the first Fulham score on the h...
How In The Heck Will He Wash His Neck If He Doesn't Have One?
Many of us are blessed, in that we were born with all of our body parts, some of which we didn't know existed until after a rigorous workout. Occasionally you hear about someone who lost a leg, like Neil Parry, who returns from intense physical rehab to again play Division I football. But a story wh...
Blonde Women Must Really Love Soccer Jerseys
Simple. What this commercial tells me is that were I to draw the attraction of a drop dead gorgeous supermodel while wearing Axe, she'll either:...
Sclemeel! Schmeichel! Hasenfeffer Incorporated!
Taking a gander at some of Saturday's Premier League results... • Arsenal 1-0 Manchester City — Well, so much for starting off the year with four straight wins. Arsenal broke the scoreless tie with an 80th-minute goal, care of Cesc Fabregas. That's a tough loss for Man City. Their young keeper, Kasp...
Osama Bin Drinkin' Is More Like It
"Hi, it's me again sports fans. Just to prove how many different kinds of crazy we are here here in the cave, we have now called for the deaths of decadent sexpots David Beckham, Wayne Rooney and Thierry Henry. Also, Justin Timberlake and P. Diddy have been added to the list. Act now, for these eter...
Only In New Jersey, Kids
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin and PLAY Magazine about soccer....
Mia Hamm Would Never Stand for This
Strangely enough, this is only the second time Al Jazeera has made an appearance on Deadspin. Sidebar: This is one of the "related videos." Awesome....
Nothing Says The EPL Like A Botched Orgy
You know, if you can't trust a soccer player to behave himself during an orgy with his teammates and prostitutes, sheesh, who can you trust?...
Trying Hard To Be Pure Of Spirit
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer....
German Soccer Shaving Scandal Raises Questions, Blinds Thousands
All things considered, all you folk have been on your best behavior this weekend. Which makes it all the more difficult to ruin a perfectly beautiful Sunday afternoon by throwing some nightmare fuel onto the fire....
It's Like, Major League Soccer, Only Overseas And Interesting
By popular demand: Recapping the first weekend of Premier League soccer action, without having a damn clue what I'm even writing, despite having Hirshey's EPL preview open in a separate window:...
Judge: Brazilian Soccer Is Too Gay
Say what you will about the legal system in our country — we are a country governed by laws, and those laws are enforced by a man who gleefully lies, splendid, amazing, artistically blessed lies — but at least we don't have people like Manoel Maximiniano Junqueira Filho, a Brazilian judge....
Even Crazy Terrorist Bastards Take Time Out For Sports
"Bin Laden here. Just a note to my homies on the Iraqi soccer team: Nice job winning the Asian Cup. We were all rooting for you here in the cave. Strength be to Allah. Oh ... and also congratulations to Barry Bonds on No. 755."...
Your Essential EPL Preview
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. Here is his preview of the upcoming EPL season, which begins August 11....
Hey Kids! Jay Mohr Is Back!
Unsilent mentioned this briefly over the weekend, but in case you missed it; Jay Mohr is back with his weekly column, and just in time for football season! You may remember Mohr from his cable series with ESPN (canceled) and column with SI.com (dropped), and for such films as Community Service. Well...
Wake up! They're Underway at Wembley
The sun is already rising on a new season in the Barclay's Premier League. The annual Community Shield match is underway at Wembley stadium pitting Machester United against Chelsea, the champions of last year's league title and FA Cup respectively. While the result of today's match won't be reflecte...
At Least They Didn't Play The Star-Spangled Banner
It's a beautiful day in Iraq. (Really!) The Iraqi soccer team brought some rare joy to a nation that's, uh, in some turmoil by winning the Asian Cup. Everyone's ecstatic, it's something to cheer about, it's a wonderful thing. And then....
Beckham May Someday Play, Maybe, Who Knows?
Our hallowed land has been graced with the presence of David Beckham for almost three weeks now. And he has played for about 14 minutes. Some MLS teams are handling it better than others....