This Is Not The Way To Watch The NCAA Tournament

This was the view I had of the Elite Eight games this weekend ... from my hospital bed. Don't worry—all the channels didn't come in that badly—only the one showing college basketball.

Yes, I checked into the emergency room on Friday night (for, let's say ... "exhaustion") about a half-hour before the tip of the Michigan State-Kansas game. Still have no idea what happened there. On Saturday afternoon, after 20 hours of staring at the ceiling, I figured the Regional Final games would help me pass the time, but apparently, the closest CBS affiliate broadcasting the game was in Guam. It was fine as long as none of the players moved.

Even better, when they finally did discharge me ... it was in the middle of the first half of the Louisville game on Sunday. So I had to rush to the pharmacy to get prescriptions, then rush home in time to catch the second half, and somehow ... it wasn't even that close. Not that I'm complaining. I don't think my fragile system could have handled a Villanova-like nail biter.

So my alma mater is in the Final Four again and I missed almost all of it, but I finally spent last night in my own bed, dreaming of reasonably-priced ticket packages. Of which, naturally, there were will be none. I'm sure that even in a depressed economy you will be able to find 75,000 Michigan residents able to pony up the home team premium for seats. But that's okay. I'll probably just end up stabbing myself in the thigh on Friday night and heading back to the E.R. Hey, you don't mess with a streak.

Oh, and one more thing about all the " the State of Michigan really needs this" stories that will nauseate you this week. I don't want to get into a whole Detroit/Ann Arbor/East Lansing "who loves who more" thing, but to all our Michigan-based readers out there, I just want to say this. If you catch any out-of-work Wolverine fans trying to latch on to this everybody-feel-good moment and saying things like "I was pulling for State all along" and (heaven forbid) "I hope WE can pull it out" ... just go ahead and punch them right in the mouth.

Lansing March Mania [Lansing State Journal] Destined 4 Detroit [The State News] A fairy tale for Tom Izzo, Magic and all Spartans [Detroit Free Press]