not Page 56 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
SICK Is A Nice Word For What Bears Fans Are (Yeah!)
As we mentioned on Monday, we were kind of surprised that the little arts & crafts project to the right here was allowed to be displayed during the Saints-Bears game on Sunday; not that we sat up that night fretting about it, but come on. That's a little classless, if you're into the "class" thing, ...
Tiger Mauls Helpless Leprechaun As Charlie Weis Looks On And Does Nothing
We are happy to report that the Sugar Bowl was one of several games available on iTunes this year, so we hope all of you Notre Dame fans took advantage of that. Just the thing to view over and over again during church. After LSU's 41-14 win Wednesday night — the Irish's ninth straight bowl defeat ...
Sugar Bowl: Talk Amongst Yourselves
In case you've forgotten, the Nokia Sugar Bowl is this evening as Charlie Weis and his group of underachieving Irishmen take on those ESPN fictional national champions, the LSU Tigers. Notre Dame is getting 8.5 points tonight and I've got a funny feeling that's a number that you must pounce on. (F...
One More Post Until It's Time to Start Drinking
Bah, I suck at timestamps. Those of you who've already seen the last post, well, sorry about that. I also suck at millitary time. Anyway, here's some news that I found troubling if only because I thought she was dead:...
We're Going To Wally World!
Someone asked us the other day whether or not our job was stressful. We thought about it for a moment and told them that our job is only stressful when we're not doing it. Doing Deadspin is the most fun thing we do; the only time it stresses us out is when we're away from the computer and terrifie...
Soccer Player To Enjoy A Year Of Imaginary Freedom
Tired of American sports figures causing mayhem with actual weapons? We present Gary Charles, a former professional English soccer player who was arrested recently for threatening a bouncer with an imaginary knife. From the BBC:...
Sadly, She Was Only On Level One
What happens when you cross Million Dollar Baby with The Miracle Worker? You get this; which we suppose is video boxing, but could also be a clearcut case of demonic possession. We blame two things for these deeply troubling images: The new wireless Wii remote, and Title IX. Clearly there are flaws ...
Michael Irvin, Deconstructed By Science
A new study, one of those studies that old white men who don't get out of the office much put together ostensibly to justify a life in which they will die alone and covered in graham crackers, makes the claim that the feeling of being in "love" exhibits behavioral changes most consistent with psycho...
So This Is What They Mean By A Friendly
We're no experts — perhaps Mr. Hirshey can help us out here — but we do know that this is just all kinds of wrong....
Bobby Knight To Be Airlifted In To Restore Order At Castro Valley High
Awhile ago we wrote about the parents' revolt at Castro Valley (Calif.) High, wherein varsity girls basketball coach Nancy Nibarger was forced to allow a special panel of "objective observers" to choose her team at preseason tryouts. She was even forced to have an ombudsman observe all of her subseq...
Ten Moments That Will Make You Cry
Just to be cruel to our delicate sensibilities, the fine folks at Chowdaheads have compiled the 10 most gruesome broken arms and legs in sports history. You can probably guess what No. 1 is; the video above is, frighteningly, only No. 3. (The anticipation in this clip is too brutal for us to handle....
Taking Down The Field Goal Posts: Fight On To Glendale
• USC 44, Notre Dame 24. I hate to be the one to point it out, but twice, Notre Dame has played Top 10 teams, and twice, they have lost by 20 or more. Obviously, this will not stop a BCS bowl game from happily taking them (supposedly, the Sugar Bowl is in love with the Irish), so there's not really ...
Notre Dame Has A Vague Recollection Of Playing A Good Football Team
The last time Notre Dame played a team that's currently ranked in the Top 25, they lost by nearly four touchdowns. Since then, despite feasting on teams like Stanford, North Carolina, Air Force and Army, they've got themselves back into the national championship picture. On the outside, about-to-be-...
The Fast And The Furious
We know that the 49ers are officially back as contenders, because one of their players was arrested on Sunday night on reckless and drunken driving charges. Just hours after the team's win over the Seattle Seahawks, wide receiver Antonio Bryant was taken into custody after his Lamborghini was seen s...
The Greatest YWML Reference Of All Time (So Far)
So, Saturday morning, we woke up, full of enthusiasm for a beautiful New York City afternoon, and we checked our email. There were, strangely, 211 new email messages; that's a lot for a weekend. We weren't sure what we'd missed; did Carl Monday do a story on Fred Smoot or something?...
An Excuse To Break Out Our Ditka Wine!
If an alien race ever decided to attack us, we know of one sure-fire way to hold off the destruction. Just send this ad into space. It's sure to render potential invaders hopelessly befuddled, so that they veer off toward a stable planet, like Saturn. Heck, we live here, and we're frightened by this...
On To Victory! (Well, Not Necessarily THAT Kind Of "Victory")
When you're a high school soccer coach, you've got several options when it comes to motivating your team. You can help them practice diving. You can teach them to pick up the football players' girlfriends when they're at a road game. You can even shower them with flop sweat. All kinds of choices....
Unpretentious, With Just A Hint Of Laundry Hamper
Strawberries, cherries and and angel's kiss in spring ... this Ditka wine is really made from all these things ......
The Skinny On The Harold Reynolds Lawsuit
Mr. Balk mentioned this yesterday, but we'll never stop having fun with The Smoking Gun's copy of Harold Reynolds' suit against ESPN. For a document put together simply to defend Reynolds' high moral character, it's full of juicy details. Some highlights:...
It's Morning In America!
So, hey, good morning, everybody. What'd we miss?...