to Page 2184 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
"We Know This Is Off The Subject A Bit, But How Much Do You Think We Could Bench?"
We don't know if Bills fan Nate Neubauer of Lancaster, N.Y., has seen the brilliant Best In Show, but we certainly hope so....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your clothes slowly go out of style ... • College Basketball: Preseason NIT, first round, Boston University at Duke. Wave your blue and white tubie things. [ESPN2] • MNF: Dallas at Philadelphia. Right now ABC must be loving that decision to suspend T.O. [ABC] • Islanders at Penguins...
Leftovers: Can You Hear Me Now?
• Oil Can Boyd indicted on phone threat charges. [Where's McCarver?] • Orioles cut ties with Palmeiro and Sosa, and they're not too thrilled with Steve Reed (6.61 ERA). [The Baltimore Chop] • Maddon to coach Devil Rays. Poor dope. [] • Kurt Busch suspended. It's a NASCAR thing. [Slobokan's Site O'Sc...
NFL Roundup: Down Goes Tice!
• What's funnier than Mike Tice being rolled over and knocked down on the sideline? Nothing, that's what. By the way, we find Tice's dopey sideline celebrations undignified, and Tom Coughlin's constant gyrations of fury incredibly amusing. • Samkon Gado, baby, Samkano Gado. Two touchdowns, one gr...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while stuck in the bathroom ... • College FB: Rutgers at Louisville. That's Lou-ville. Card-nils. [ESPN2] • PGA: HSBC Champions, third round, at Shanghai. Hope Tiger doesn't run into these guys. [The Golf Channel] • NBA: L.A. Lakers at Philadelphia, Detroit at Portland. Honey, do we ha...
Clinton Portis Still Selling Crazy, Man
In case you thought Redskins running back Clinton Portis was becoming more sane as the weeks went by rather than less, you can relax. We proudly present his newest concoction: "Sheriff Gonna Getcha."...
Orton's Surprisingly Healthy Attitude
We have a hard time making it through Sports Illustrated anymore, so we missed this quote from your friend and ours Kyle Orton, whose pictures of drunken carousing in Iowa City earlier this year were first seen on Deadspin....
Leftovers: Going South
• T.O. talking to Falcons? We seriously hope so. [MSNBC] • WBC votes to give Rahman heavyweight title. Hey, we didn't fight this week either. Can we have one? [Run To Win] • (Drum roll) Shaq's cast removed (ta ta da da da da DAHHH!). Now what? [FoxSports] • Clemens, 43, files for free agency. Wow. [...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your eight-year-old son and his agent sign a pro soccer contract in the other room ... • College FB: Boise State at Fresno State. What's the over-under, about 100? [ESPN] • PGA: HSBC Champions, first round, at Shanghai. Tiger Woods getting in some great rounds, plus all his shirts a...
Leftovers: Continuing T.O. Coverage
• McNabb: "We have to move on." Us: "No, let's linger on this a bit." [Philly.com] • Chris Carpenter wins Cy Young Award, becoming the first Cardinal to win it since Bob Gibson. Wee! [Viva El Birdos] • The Carolina cheerleader incident wasn't the only great thing to happen in a bathroom. [The Black ...
The Amazing Ray Ratto Mug Shift
Who says we don't have clout? Following our blistering indictment of Ray Ratto's new CBS Sportsline column mug yesterday, the site changed it. Ratto's face is now partly visible, where in the first one you could only see his eyes and the top of his head. They still have a way to go, obviously, but...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as The Terminator licks his wounds ... • College FB: West Virginia at Cincinnati. Mortly Ivy will stop the Bearcats cold, we predict. Of course, it's quite possible we don't know what we're talking about. [ESPN2] • NBA: Miami at Indiana, Sacramento at Denver. Overindulging at the pro h...
Leftovers: No Mas
• Injury forces WBC champ Klitschko to retire, HBO to air 4 extra hours of "Six Feet Under." [Flying Ass Monkey] Bill Simmons profiled in the Baltimore Sun. Good: All kinds of hints that he'll leave ESPN someday. Bad: The author keeps calling him a "blogger." Ugly: Compared to both Hunter S. Thompso...
Could Theo Be Returning?
All kinds of rumblings today about Theo Epstein potentially coming back as Red Sox GM, with the Boston Herald reporting that several Boston officials have been trying to talk him back into the job....
Ray Ratto's Weird Mug
San Francisco Chronicle sports columnist Ray Ratto is a talented writer — he'll never appear in our feature Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks, for instance. (We're pretty sure. Unless he does). A former contributor to ESPN.com, he recently shifted over to CBS Sportsline. But with that move came th...
Why Your City Sucks
Looks like the Maloof brothers got a hold of the Jumbotron controls while drunk again. In what the team says will be a regular feature, when the Pistons were introduced last night, the Kings ran a feature about the city of Detroit on the scoreboard. You can probably guess what it was: horrible vis...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as West Virginia slowly sneaks over and becomes part of regular Virginia ... • College Football: Southern Mississippi at Marshall. Ravaged by Hurricane Katrina, Southern Miss fans might have bigger things on their minds as Golden Eagles tangle with Thundering Herd. [ESPN2] • NHL: Bosto...
Manning's Cute Little Cheerleader Problem
As you might have noticed, sometimes we like to make fun of Peyton Manning's (heavily) rumored sexual orientation from time to time. But our degenerate gambler brother at Oddjack has a strange little scoop that implies Peyton likes to hang out with cheerleaders of his own. From former Indianapolis...
Leftovers: You're My Angel, You're My Everything
• Meanwhile, in non-machete attack news, Angels' Colon wins A.L. Cy Young Award. [6-4-2] • Chuck Klosterman now writing for Page 2. Wonder whose idea that was. [ESPN Page 2] • Root for the Boot: Piazza may play for Italy in World Games. [Baseball Musings] • Bang the oil drum slowly: Rudd to retire f...
Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks: Jim Souhan
OK, we surrender. The white flag you see waving above the rubble means that we're coming out peacefully, kicking several weeks worth of Jim Souhan columns ahead of us. That's it, you've taken all the fight out of us. We have freaking had it with writing like Souhan's — the tortured prose; the slop...