This Headline Will Not Include Barry Bonds

• Way to go, Iraq! Oh, sorry. • Pujols, Pop-A-Shot. • Gilbert is funny when he takes other people's jokes. • Quiet, Deion. • The live report from the Arena Bowl. • Pete Rose is charming. • Ow ow ow. • Pac Man Jones, rasslin'. • We're map happy! • Goodnight, ESPN. • Matt Leinart is optimistic about the Buzzsaw's chances. • Goodbye, Bill Walsh. • The Green Bay Packers have their finger on the pulse of the Internets.

That'll do it for us, folks; Unsilent Majority is your navigator through another weekend of glory, hope and good cheer. Those in DC for the Pants Party, be safe out there, and get the Cards a sweep, would ya? Be safe out there, and we'll see you Monday.