4/30/2011 - Armless Man To Throw Ceremonial First Pitch At Tonight's Dodgers Game

4/30/2011 - Here's Video Of A Greek Soccer Match That Involved Riot Police And Hoses

4/30/2011 - If You Think LeBron James Quit On The Cavs In Last Year's Playoffs, LeBron James Thinks You're "Corny"

4/30/2011 - Your "They Very Well Can't Hold The Crown Royal 400 On The Lord's Day" Open Thread

4/30/2011 - A Study Returns Easy Answers to Questions Not Yet Asked

4/30/2011 - Here's Video Of A Swedish Table-Tennis Battle Featuring The Elusive No-Look Spin-Shot Winner

4/30/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXV

4/30/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/30/2011 - Here's Video Of A Very Pretty Goal From Today's Chelsea/Tottenham Hotspur Match

4/30/2011 - The Governor Of Ohio Totally Taunted Browns Fans The Other Day

4/30/2011 - Here's A Cartoon Rendering Of Roger McDowell's Recent Conversation With San Francisco Giants Fans

4/30/2011 - Young Man Wants You To Realize The Grizzlies Beating The San Antonio Spurs Is A Really Big Deal

4/29/2011 - NFL Draft Pundit @I_Just_Came Bathes In, Retreats From The Spotlight

4/29/2011 - The Week In Deadspin

4/29/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXIV

4/29/2011 - NFL Lockout Back On (For Serious This Time)

4/29/2011 - Manny Ramirez Isn't Really Going Away

4/29/2011 - MLB Actually Has A Rule About Using Twitter After Being Ejected

4/29/2011 - Falcons GM Tries To Justify Julio Jones

4/29/2011 - Josh Smith Responds To "Crazy Bandwagon Columnist" Who Guaranteed Hawks Would Blow Series Lead

4/29/2011 - Rick Ross Will Escort Manny Pacquiao For Mosley Fight

4/29/2011 - Even Your TV Can't Believe How Poorly The Vikings Drafted

4/29/2011 - Vancouver Sun Columnist Has Transparent Crush On Sedin Twins

4/29/2011 - Royal Wedding Wins Race

4/29/2011 - Paul Shirley And The Fat Woman Get Political

4/29/2011 - Of Pomp And Circumstance

4/29/2011 - Lockout's Back On (UPDATE: Maybe Sort Of Not Yet)

4/29/2011 - Frank McCourt Is Basically Charlie Sheen, At This Point

4/29/2011 - Year Of The Pitcher Dies Premature Death, Aged 29 Days

4/29/2011 - A Brief Examination Of Mick Foley's EBay Firesale

4/29/2011 - A Good Old Fashioned Pussyblock!

4/29/2011 - Maple Leafs' Swedish Goalie Prospect Is A Terrible Rapper

4/29/2011 - Soccer Team Signs One-Year-Old After Audition Goes Viral

4/29/2011 - The Bears Forgot To Report Their Draft-Day Trade, So It Never Went Through

4/29/2011 - As Good As It Feels, Coaches Probably Shouldn't Hit Reporters

4/29/2011 - Deion Sanders May Have Found A New Football-Playing Host Upon Which He Can Attach

4/29/2011 - Your Royal Wedding Open Thread

4/28/2011 - More Baseball Fans Care About Andre Ethier's Bowels Than Chipper Jones's Switch-Hitting Prowess

4/28/2011 - This Is Exactly What You'd Expect Jerry Jones's "War Room" To Look Like, Isn't It?

4/28/2011 - How an Imperfect Player Became the Perfect Madden Cover Pick

4/28/2011 - Here's Video Proving An Australian Rugby Player Didn't Stick His Fingers In His Cousin's Ass

4/28/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/28/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXIII

4/28/2011 - Roger Goodell Silences Boos, "We Want Football" Chants With A Moment Of Silence

4/28/2011 - Your Annual Professional-Football Player-Selection Show Open Thread

4/28/2011 - This Promo For A 1989 Josh Brolin Movie Makes A Convincing Case Against Steroids, Short Shorts

4/28/2011 - An Exclusive Interview With Tommy Craggs About The Bill Simmons "Grantland" Project

4/28/2011 - Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread

4/28/2011 - Dana White Demands A Porn Star On A Leash

4/28/2011 - Real Madrid Is So Butthurt Right Now

4/28/2011 - How Kevin Durant's Jump Shot Knocked Denver Out Of The Playoffs

4/28/2011 - God's Gift Commits To St. John's

4/28/2011 - John Daly, Marriage Expert, Thinks Tiger Wasn't Getting Enough Sex In His

4/28/2011 - Yao Ming May Actually Be Stopping People From Eating Shark Fin Soup

4/28/2011 - Yankees Season Ticket Holders Use AOL And Go To Columbia, And Other Things Gleaned From The Leaked Docs

4/28/2011 - It's Only A Matter Of Time Before An NFL Team's Financials Are Leaked

4/28/2011 - The Perils Of Pissing At A Bruins Game When You Are A Canadiens Fan

4/28/2011 - Isn't It About Time MLB Takes Over The Mets?

4/28/2011 - Here's How Gary Neal's Buzzer-Beater Sounded To San Antonio

4/28/2011 - Gloria Allred Had A Rather Erotic Press Conference Yesterday (Mildly NSFW)

4/28/2011 - Armor-Clad Waterskiing Samurai Declares War On Stupid Fish

4/28/2011 - Jack Edwards's Baffling Pro-Boston, Anti-Royalty Rant

4/28/2011 - Here's A Beautiful Animation Of The First Of Five El Clásicos This Year

4/28/2011 - Gary Neal's Buzzer-Beating Three Keeps The Spurs Alive

4/28/2011 - Here's Video Of An Egyptian Soccer Player Named Shadi Mohamed Apparently Spitting On His Goalie

4/27/2011 - Both Barcelona And Real Madrid Managed To Embarrass Real Madrid During, After El Clásico IV

4/27/2011 - Here's Video Of That Mile-Wide Tornado Deciding, On A Whim, To Spare Alabama's Bryant-Denny Stadium

4/27/2011 - Today In Great Quotes

4/27/2011 - Madden Gets in Trouble for Outing a Team's New Uniform

4/27/2011 - Figure Skater Gracefully Elbows The Shit Out Of Her Partner's Face

4/27/2011 - Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread

4/27/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/27/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXII

4/27/2011 - Yankees Accidentally Leak Personal Info Of 20,000 Season Ticket Holders

4/27/2011 - Livan Hernandez Is Wrapped Up In Puerto Rican Drug Dealer's Octopus Tentacles, Claims Awesome Graphic

4/27/2011 - The Bunny Video To End All Bunny Videos

4/27/2011 - "People Are Going To Start Punching Babies": Among The Almost-Thugs In Vancouver

4/27/2011 - Clint Dempsey Bangs One In With A Flying Side Volley

4/27/2011 - Peyton Hillis Is Madden NFL 12's Cover Star

4/27/2011 - Anonymous Baltimore Orioles Employee Goes To Great Lengths To Inform Us That Coworkers' Wives Also Hate Obama

4/27/2011 - Update: Oddibe McDowell's Water Bill Is Now $80.21

4/27/2011 - Your Real Madrid-Barcelona Tercero Clásico Open Thread

4/27/2011 - The Chicago-Indiana Five-Game Shoving Match Is Finally Over

4/27/2011 - Obama Released His Birth Certificate In The Face Of Unrelenting Pressure From Tommy Tuberville

4/27/2011 - Roger Goodell Is Going To Be A Big Baby About This Lockout Until The Very End

4/27/2011 - Real Salt Lake's Robbie Russell Scored 1590 On His SATs, Has Mother Who Was Hit By Shrapnel

4/27/2011 - As With Many Things, Rick Pitino Pulls Out Of Puerto Rican Coaching Job After Brief Flirtation

4/27/2011 - Diamondbacks Front Office Uses All-Star Game As Excuse To Lip Synch Worst Song Ever Created

4/27/2011 - How Colleges Lie About Female Athletes

4/27/2011 - Wheelchair-Bound Fan Storms Field, Very Slowly

4/27/2011 - Patrick Kane Needs A Drink

4/26/2011 - These Old Pro Wrestling Magazines Are Delightful

4/26/2011 - Here's Your MLB Play Of The Season As Ryan Raburn Assists A Home Run

4/26/2011 - Kansas City Woman, Thick As A Snicker, Coveted By Young Chiefs Cornerback For Possible Romance

4/26/2011 - Albert Haynesworth Allegedly Swiped His Credit Card In A Waitress's Cleavage

4/26/2011 - Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread

4/26/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXI

4/26/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/26/2011 - Jeff Foster And The Brutal Art Of The NBA's Playoff Foul

4/26/2011 - We Regret Not Covering The Thong-Wearing, Feces-Spreading Meth Addict Raiders Fan Sooner

4/26/2011 - Arcade Fire Performs At Cubs Game; Fans Politely Pretend To Know Who They Are

4/26/2011 - Dear Roger Goodell: This Is What A Typical NFL Career Looks Like

4/26/2011 - Tony Kornheiser Finally, Frustratingly Weighs In On Dan Snyder

4/26/2011 - Everything You Wanted To Know About Fantasy Mutant Sperm But Were Afraid To Ask

4/26/2011 - Manny Ramirez Hit A One-Handed Homer At 18, And Other Revelations

4/26/2011 - Did Everyone Notice That Jered Weaver Is The Best Pitcher In Baseball Right Now?

4/26/2011 - Here's What Confused NFL Players Are Doing This Morning

4/26/2011 - Somebody Poisoned The Family Of NC State's Adorable Wolfpack Mascot

4/26/2011 - Dan Snyder Explains Why He's Being A Prick

4/26/2011 - Keep Your Domestic Squabbles Out Of The Pepsi Center, People

4/26/2011 - Tony Allen Shaved A Glittery Grizzly Into His Hair Last Night

4/26/2011 - Caps Fans Skip Parody Videos, Move Straight To Priceless Masterpieces

4/25/2011 - Dumbest Fish Alive Deserve To Be Dead

4/25/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXX

4/25/2011 - Sideline Reporter Looks Accustomed To Getting Pummeled In The Head With Soccer Balls

4/25/2011 - The NFL Lockout Is Over, At Least For A Few More Minutes

4/25/2011 - Luke Scott Is Still A Gun-Humping Birther Survivalist Lunatic, Chickenshit ESPN Story Won't Say

4/25/2011 - Today In Great Ledes

4/25/2011 - DeAngelo Hall Says Jason Kidd's Son Still Has An Enormous Head

4/25/2011 - Chris Paul's Shake-Up Of Andrew Bynum Is Pretty Close To A Point Guard's Masterpiece

4/25/2011 - Sportswriters Struggle With Turns Of Phrase For Franklin Gutierrez's Spastic Pooping

4/25/2011 - Lakers Player Arrested For Allegedly Assaulting Pregnant IHOP Waitress (Pregnancy Update)

4/25/2011 - Iowa Gives Coaching Award To Man Whose Workout Sent 13 Players To The Hospital

4/25/2011 - Jim Tressel Is The Perfect Coach

4/25/2011 - The Knicks Come Home

4/24/2011 - Here's Video Of A Bunch Of Yale Kids Humiliating The Rational Branches Of Their Family Trees

4/24/2011 - Here's An Unintentionally Splendid Moment In Soccer-Match Photography

4/24/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXIX

4/24/2011 - Here's Your Tony LaRussa Eye Update

4/24/2011 - It Was Only A Matter Of Time Before Charlie Sheen Infiltrated The Florida Marlins

4/24/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/24/2011 - RichRod Doesn't Think Jumping From West Virginia To Michigan Was That Good Of An Idea, After All

4/24/2011 - Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread

4/24/2011 - Erin Andrews Has Been Posting Pictures Of Various Bruises In Recent Days

4/24/2011 - Marriage License: Chris Bosh Is Officially Spoken For. Chris Bosh: No I'm Not.

4/23/2011 - This Lady's Likes Include Jeff Gordon And Profanity; Her Dislikes Are Jimmie Johnson, Talladega, Bras

4/23/2011 - Addicted To What The Sticks Did

4/23/2011 - Man Dry Humps Cleveland Indians Mascot

4/23/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXVIII

4/23/2011 - Your MLB Open Thread

4/23/2011 - Here's Video Of A Seattle Sounders Leg Getting Broken During Last Night's Game

4/23/2011 - Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread

4/23/2011 - Dolphins WR Brandon Marshall's Wife Allegedly Stabs Him, But He Claims He Fell Onto A Broken Glass Vase

4/23/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/23/2011 - Doctor Writes That Pinkeye Is Most Certainly Not To Blame For Tony LaRussa's Frightening Face

4/23/2011 - Here's The Scene That Awaited The Orlando Magic's Jason Richardson After Last Night's Pimp-Slap Ejection

4/22/2011 - EA Sports' "Football Czar" Opens With A Two-Month Drill

4/22/2011 - Stop Your Judgmental Infield Chatter While I Handle The Pill, Softball Pitcher Pleads

4/22/2011 - The Brief Local Nightmare Of A City Whose Mayor Is Kevin Johnson Is Over For Now

4/22/2011 - The Week In Deadspin

4/22/2011 - David Foster Wallace Wrote A Book About You

4/22/2011 - HOLY SHIT BUFFALO BILLS VEAL CHOP

4/22/2011 - Here, Listen To All 30 NHL Teams' Goal Horns

4/22/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXVII

4/22/2011 - How Not To Get Caught Cheating

4/22/2011 - So It's Come To This: Mets Fans Wearing Paper Bags

4/22/2011 - Rafael Nadal 0, His Underwear 1

4/22/2011 - No One's Going To Baseball Games, But Here's Why MLB Isn't Concerned

4/22/2011 - Baseball Advertising Creeps Into Fair Territory

4/22/2011 - Naked Man Invades Home, Steals Prized Kansas Basketball Outfit For Cover

4/22/2011 - Juan Agudelo Scored A Special Goal Against DC United Last Night

4/22/2011 - This Is Not Andrew Ference Giving Habs Fans The Finger

4/21/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXVI

4/21/2011 - Now, Tony LaRussa Is Ugly On The Outside, Too

4/21/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/21/2011 - Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread

4/21/2011 - Here's Jon Gruden Saying Weird Shit To Future NFL QBs

4/21/2011 - The Time The KKK Politely Asked For A "Klan Day" At The Reds' Ballpark

4/21/2011 - Today In Great Ledes

4/21/2011 - It's Hard To Blame Someone For Not Wanting To Play In Winnipeg

4/21/2011 - Geriatric Clemson Football Fans Have Finally Gone Too Far

4/21/2011 - Aaron Rodgers Got Shafted In The Madden Cover Vote

4/21/2011 - This Russell Westbrook Play Is Everything That's Great About The Thunder

4/21/2011 - One Ref's Fall Over A Ceremonial Carpet Is Another Ref's Fall Over The Same Ceremonial Carpet

4/21/2011 - There's No Good Time To Call A Hockey Player "Hitler," But On Hitler's Birthday Is Especially Poor Timing

4/21/2011 - Bill Plaschke Is Easily Distracted

4/21/2011 - How To Free Yourself Of The Dreaded “Sketchy” Label

4/21/2011 - What Real Salt Lake's Draw Last Night Says About American Soccer

4/21/2011 - HOLY SHIT MONSTER JELLYFISH

4/21/2011 - This Might Be The Dirtiest Hockey Play We've Seen In A While

4/21/2011 - Here Are Both Of Last Night's 2OT Cockpunches

4/21/2011 - The Copa Del Rey Trophy Ended Up Lodged Under A Bus Bumper Last Night

4/21/2011 - Phil Jackson's Zenergy Lulled At Least One Person To Sleep In L.A. Last Night

4/21/2011 - Let's Help Sarah H. Win $10K

4/20/2011 - Ray Lewis Went To A Small North Carolina College To Talk About Spirits, Thunder, Cards And Whatnot

4/20/2011 - Here's Video Of The Cristiano Ronaldo Goal That Beat Barcelona Today

4/20/2011 - The Lady Who Yelled At Cops To Stop Beating, Tasing The Patriotic Pirates Fan Was Fined $1,000

4/20/2011 - Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread

4/20/2011 - Holy Shit, This Guy From Arizona Really Might Not Have A Mouth

4/20/2011 - Don't Worry, Dodgers Fans: Bud Selig Is In Charge Now

4/20/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXV

4/20/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/20/2011 - Woody Durham, The Vin Scully Of North Carolina: An Appreciation

4/20/2011 - Bad Beats: Oddsmakers Love The Heat, Because Everyone Else Hates Them

4/20/2011 - MLB Won't Let Us Show You Travis Snider Breaking His Bat Over His Knee, So Here's A Fucking Drawing I Did Instead

4/20/2011 - High School Baseball Player Gets Awesomely Creative With His Slide At The Plate

4/20/2011 - Tim Donaghy Has A Theory On Danny Crawford And The Mavericks

4/20/2011 - North Dakota Passes A Law To Protect UND's Fighting Sioux Mascot; NCAA Will Make Them Break It

4/20/2011 - The Restless Mind Of C.J. Wilson, The Rangers' Straight-Edge, Tolkien-Reading Enemy Of MLB Douchebags

4/20/2011 - Your Barcelona-Real Madrid Segundo Clásico Open Thread

4/20/2011 - What Does The Splinter Group Of Players Mean For The Lockout?

4/20/2011 - Kurt Warner Talks Dancing, Theodicy On His Good Day L.A. Interview

4/20/2011 - Here Are Some Strange Things NFL Prospects Have To Deal With

4/20/2011 - How These Two White Guys Wound Up In This Kendrick Perkins Family Photo

4/20/2011 - Police Somehow Find 6-Foot-9, 300-Pound Former NBA Player Who Allegedly Pistol-Whipped A Guy At A BBQ

4/20/2011 - Your Football Team Will Win 11, Maybe 12 Games Next Season

4/20/2011 - NYDN: "Blah blah blah blah rain blah blah blah Niese blah blah Astros blah blah Mets got spanked."

4/20/2011 - Jackass Columnist Blames Pitcher For Choosing Childbirth Over Pitching

4/20/2011 - An Analysis Of Steve Nash's Emotions As He Becomes The Latest Nicki Minaj Lap Dance Victim

4/20/2011 - British Soccer Announcer Makes Most British Goal Call Ever

4/20/2011 - Your Dreams And Skulls Shall Be Ground Beneath The Treads Of PhillieBot

4/20/2011 - Star Of Fred Claus Points And Laughs At Four-Time NHL All-Star

4/19/2011 - This Is How Four Guys Who Can't Play Basketball Let New York Down

4/19/2011 - Over At CNN, ESPN's LZ Granderson Takes Aim At American Culture, Whore-Friendly Panties

4/19/2011 - Transgenders On Wheels

4/19/2011 - A Glimpse Of Our Impossible Future: NFL Releases 2011 Schedule

4/19/2011 - With Apologies To Jack Edwards, This Junior Hockey League Announcer Is The Homer To End All Homers

4/19/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXIV

4/19/2011 - Frank McCourt Sat In The Cheap Seats

4/19/2011 - Drunk Fan Joins Hockey Fight

4/19/2011 - Chris Paul Wishes He Could Dunk Like Derrick Rose

4/19/2011 - Stephon Marbury Plans To Take Over China And Then Build His Own City In South Carolina

4/19/2011 - Fewer People Watch The Bobcats On TV Than Actually Go To Games

4/19/2011 - How To Deal With Crappy Refereeing: Quit The League

4/19/2011 - Bob Knight Continues His Solo Defamation Crusade Against John Calipari

4/19/2011 - Is Batman REALLY A Superhero?

4/19/2011 - Blood On The Walls: Choice Bits From Blazers Owner Paul Allen's New Book

4/19/2011 - Jack Edwards: Homer To End All Homers

4/19/2011 - We're Not Sayin', We're Just Sayin'

4/19/2011 - The Most Deliberate Own Goal You'll Ever See

4/19/2011 - NBA Admits That Kendrick Perkins Should Have Had Two Points Instead Of Four On Sunday

4/19/2011 - Qatari Government Begins Arresting World Cup Reporters 11 Years Before World Cup In Qatar

4/19/2011 - What A 106 MPH Fastball Really Looks Like

4/19/2011 - Putting The NHL's TV Deal With Versus In Context

4/19/2011 - He's Not Signaling How Many Outs Remain

4/18/2011 - ESPN Will Now Attempt To Be Kind Of Honest About Its Personalities' Endorsements

4/18/2011 - The Poopiness Of The Long Distance Runner

4/18/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXIII

4/18/2011 - Reds Pitcher Mike Leake Allegedly Tries To Make Off With $59.88 In Macy's Merchandise [UPDATE]

4/18/2011 - Help Us Subvert MLB Video: Submit Your Highlights To Become The Official Team Deadspin

4/18/2011 - Hey, Wasn't Basketball Awesome This Weekend? Let's Have A Lockout.

4/18/2011 - Caps Coach Calls MSG Facilities "Horrible," Is Correct

4/18/2011 - That Nude Photo Of Skylar Diggins Is Not Actually Skylar Diggins

4/18/2011 - American Almost Wins Boston Marathon!

4/18/2011 - Lionel Messi Smacks The Ball At Real Madrid Fans But Doesn’t Mean It. Honest.

4/18/2011 - Notre Dame's Explanation For Declan Sullivan's Death Is Conciliatory, Still Not Good Enough

4/18/2011 - Smallest Fish Wins Fishing Competition

4/18/2011 - We Need Youth Baseball Teams To Reenact MLB Highlights For Us Because MLB Hates Its Fans (And Probably Children, Too)

4/18/2011 - MLB Won't Let Us Show You Video Of Justin Verlander's Amusing Balk, So Here's A Fucking Drawing I Did Instead

4/18/2011 - The Good, The Bad, And The Doughnuts

4/18/2011 - Jon Barry Can't Stop Giggling At Derrick Rose

4/18/2011 - Victor Ortiz Versus Andre Berto Round Six: A Lesson In Gameness

4/18/2011 - UGA Recruits Rob UGA Locker Room On UGA Recruiting Visit

4/18/2011 - Sean Avery Leaning On His Own Stick Until It Breaks Is Probably A Metaphor For Something

4/17/2011 - Let's Watch The Brawl That Added To The Widespread "Mayhem" At Rutgers U This Weekend

4/17/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXII

4/17/2011 - Here's Video Of A Really Cool Goal From A Dutch Soccer Match Yesterday

4/17/2011 - Here's Video Of The Nick Saban Statue Descending "From The Clouds Of Heaven"

4/17/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/17/2011 - Colin Cowherd Will Have You Know His Script Can Get Worse By The Hour

4/17/2011 - Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread

4/17/2011 - Listen To Deadspin's Emma Carmichael on NPR's "All Things Considered"

4/17/2011 - The World Famous USC Song Girls Drench Themselves In A Pool For Charity

4/17/2011 - Floyd Mayweather Accompanied 50 Cent To Fight Night At Foxwoods And All He Got Was Booed

4/16/2011 - There Are No Winners In Louisiana Jello Wrestling, Only Screams And Suggestive Techniques

4/16/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXXI

4/16/2011 - Man Uses A Chipper Jones Home Run As Excuse To Get To Second Base

4/16/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/16/2011 - The Binder That Ties You To A Game

4/16/2011 - Here's A Photo Of A Very Young Indians Fan About To Pound A Bottle Of Bud Light

4/16/2011 - Johan Franzen's Face Is A Sight To Behold

4/16/2011 - The NBA And NHL Playoffs Are Fine And All, But The Rest Of The World Is Watching El Clasico Open Thread

4/16/2011 - Here's Video Of A Kevin Durant Fan Getting "Thunder" Tattooed On Her Thigh

4/16/2011 - Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread

4/16/2011 - Tommy B. Took His Tale Of Octopus-Tossing Woe To Detroit Radio Yesterday

4/16/2011 - Picture Of An Engineering Student In Bikini Gets College Race-Car Team Suspended From Competition

4/16/2011 - The Tax Man's Charges Against Lenny Dykstra Actually Involve A Kitchen Sink

4/15/2011 - Old Lady Bulls Fan Has Some Unkind Words For Chicago's Eastern Conference Rivals

4/15/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXX

4/15/2011 - Josh Elliott Reluctantly Submits To An Interview With Us Before His Last Day At ESPN

4/15/2011 - Gretzky Needs His Damn Money, Writes ESPN Columnist

4/15/2011 - Will The NBA Be Fined For Breaking Its Own Rules In Fining Kobe Bryant?

4/15/2011 - LeBron James And Erik Spoelstra Enter Honeymoon Phase Just In Time For The Playoffs

4/15/2011 - The Week In Deadspin

4/15/2011 - Reader Writes In About "Heinous," Camel-Toe-Laden Fishing Program; We Fix It

4/15/2011 - Dilbert Creator Pretends to Be His Own Biggest Fan on Message Boards

4/15/2011 - OK, Bleacher Report. You Win.

4/15/2011 - The 2010-11 Washington Wizards, In One Handy Microcosm

4/15/2011 - 21 NBA Players Gave Each Other A Disease

4/15/2011 - Joba Chamberlain Will Protect His PlateYou Can Now Watch Joba Protect His Plate At The Official Website Of Major League Baseball

4/15/2011 - This Is Omar Vizquel Singing A Goo Goo Dolls Song

4/15/2011 - Here's A Blurry Photo Of Blake Griffin Helping To Push A Disabled Car

4/15/2011 - Barkley Shut Up And Jam! Predicts The Thunder-Nuggets Series, And More

4/15/2011 - Here's What Happens When A Same-Sex Couple Considers Kissing On Kiss-Cam

4/15/2011 - NBA Selects Man Who Relocated The Sonics And Lied About It To Head Relocation Committee

4/15/2011 - The Greatest Facebook Fail Ever

4/15/2011 - The Horrors Of The Sports-Free Vacation

4/15/2011 - Royals Grounds Crew Worker Encounters The Steamrolling Terror Of The Tarp

4/15/2011 - We Would Like Stories Of Your Gambling Travails, Please

4/15/2011 - 12 Of The Year's Punchiest Hockey Fights, Evaluated By A Boxing Writer

4/15/2011 - Soccer Fans In Portland Behave Curiously Like Soccer Fans In Any City Outside The United States

4/15/2011 - Swiss Hockey Champion Breaks Really Cheap-Looking Trophy

4/15/2011 - Does The NHL Have The Balls To Continue Their Head Shot Crackdown In The Playoffs?

4/15/2011 - Sidney Crosby, Rebecca Black, and Parody Videos: Everything We Hate, For A Good Cause

4/15/2011 - This Uruguayan Striker Sets The Standard For The 360 Spin-Move Goal

4/15/2011 - Why We Can't Tell You Which Soccer Player Had An Affair With This Lady

4/15/2011 - Here's Video Of A Pro Golfer Needing 16 Shots To Conquer A Par-4 Hole

4/15/2011 - It Sure Looks Like Brian Wilson's Pal The Machine Had A Lovely Day After The Closer's Hair-Metal Birthday Bash

4/14/2011 - Oh Great, Somebody Sent A Link To Another Horrendously Infuriating Canucks "Parody" Video

4/14/2011 - The Owl-Kicking Panamanian Soccer Player Has Acquired A Taste For Human Ribs

4/14/2011 - Of Course Somebody In NWA Gear Recorded Barry Bonds's Post-Verdict Press Conference

4/14/2011 - A Bunch Of People Came Up With $25K So UConn Basketball Players Can Ride On Parade Floats After All

4/14/2011 - Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread

4/14/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXIX (Alleged Arson Edition)

4/14/2011 - If You Throw An Octopus On The Ice in Detroit You Could Be Fined $500 And Ejected (UPDATE: Statements from Red Wings, Police)

4/14/2011 - Surly Flag Football Coach Needs Team To Learn How To "Grab A Fucking Flag And Pull It Off." STAT

4/14/2011 - Rio Ferdinand Is Cyberbullying Piers Morgan And His Moobs, For Some Reason

4/14/2011 - Kobe Is Sorry, But It Wasn't A Damn Foul

4/14/2011 - The Sultan Of Twat: Babe Ruth's Swinging First Few Years With The Yankees

4/14/2011 - The Cowbell Tolls For The Sacramento Kings

4/14/2011 - Wizards Don't Want You Giggling At The Prospect Of Two Men Kissing On Their Kiss-Cam

4/14/2011 - Here’s Part Two Of Our (Nearly) Exhaustive Video Compilation Of Blake Griffin Dunks

4/14/2011 - Wally Backman Verbally Assaults His Team, Part 158

4/14/2011 - A Quintessential Night In An American Hospital

4/14/2011 - A Guide To Augusta National, Courtesy Of A Pro Golfer's Yardage Book

4/14/2011 - News Reports That Subtly Point Out That Al Davis Is Not In Fact "Doing Fine": A Gallery

4/14/2011 - The Stupid Barry Bonds Prosecution, In A Stupid Nutshell

4/14/2011 - Semin Leads The Capitals To Sweet, Sweaty Extended-Time Victory

4/14/2011 - It Sure Looks Like Brian Wilson Had A Lovely Birthday In Scottsdale

4/13/2011 - Here's Video Of A Goal That Made A Minor-League Hockey Announcer Lose Any Semblance Of Control

4/13/2011 - The Dodgers Decided It's Not A Good Idea To Sell Half-Priced Booze At Day Games

4/13/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXVIII

4/13/2011 - Either Somebody Comes Up With $25K By Friday Or UConn's Championship Parade Is Off

4/13/2011 - Here's Video Of A Kentucky Football Recruit Tackling a Spring Break Rent-A-Guard Into A Pool

4/13/2011 - Your Start Of The National Hockey League Playoffs Open Thread

4/13/2011 - Wife Of Phillies Reliever Forgets Comments Like These Will Not Go Over Well In Philadelphia (UPDATE)

4/13/2011 - One Reason Sir Charles Doesn't Like Reporters Is Because They're Idiots

4/13/2011 - Madden Moves Its Release Date To The End Of August

4/13/2011 - Barry Bonds Guilty On One Count Of Obstruction; America Now Safe From The Scourge Of PEDs

4/13/2011 - Listen To These Florida Basketball Players Woozily Plot How To Get Out Of A Burglary Arrest

4/13/2011 - Lil' Wayne Likely First Rapper Ever To Wear A Women's College Basketball Jersey In Public

4/13/2011 - In Mr. Jackson's First-Grade Class, Steve Blake Gets Chicken Pox; Kobe, Bynum, and Artest At Risk

4/13/2011 - Watch Tim Lincecum Pitch In Super Slo-Mo

4/13/2011 - In His Own Words: Thomas Stancil, Running Back (2002-03)

4/13/2011 - In His Own Words: Tico Pringle, Defensive Back (2006)

4/13/2011 - In His Own Words: Ray Hudson, Running Back (2004-06)

4/13/2011 - Two Decades Of Honor Code Violations

4/13/2011 - The Truth About Race, Religion, And The Honor Code At BYU

4/13/2011 - The Truth About Race, Religion, And The Honor Code At BYU

4/13/2011 - We Welcome John Steigerwald To The Club Of Assholes Most Distinguished

4/13/2011 - Watch Deadspin's Luke O'Brien Join Martin Bashir Live on MSNBC

4/13/2011 - Brian Giles' Attorney Takes Ball Out During Trial Break And Has Chuck Knoblauch Sign It

4/13/2011 - Amazingly, Someone Else Now Claims To Have Invented The "Charge" Chant

4/13/2011 - Sterger Tears Her Way Through Second Part Of GMA Interview

4/13/2011 - Dueling Mullets Welcome You To Day One Of The NHL Playoffs

4/13/2011 - Kobe Bryant Calls A Ref Something He Shouldn't

4/13/2011 - Will Sheridan, Former Villanova F, Has Made A Fairly Strange Music Video

4/12/2011 - The Jimmer Is Too Famous To Attend The Classes, BYU Says

4/12/2011 - ESPN's Joe Morgan Replacement Bobby Valentine Is Not Making A Whole Lot Of Sense

4/12/2011 - Washed-Up Larry Johnson Has Settled His 2008 Drink-Spitting Lawsuit For $100k

4/12/2011 - Mets Games Plastered With Commercials From This Charming Bankruptcy Lawyer

4/12/2011 - Jog Angry With Sean Penn And Company

4/12/2011 - SonicsGate Creator Just Wants An Unmolested Trip To Costco, A Basketball Team In Seattle

4/12/2011 - Comatose Giants Fan Shouldn't Have Been Wearing A Giants Jersey, Writes Dumbass

4/12/2011 - Ex-49ers Color Analyst Possibly Fired For Raunchy Labia-Lovin' Talk (With NSFW Audio)

4/12/2011 - Wally Backman Verbally Assaults An Umpire, Part 79

4/12/2011 - Stat and Swizz Team Up To Ruin "Go New York, Go New York, Go"

4/12/2011 - Here's Your Champions League Open Thread

4/12/2011 - This Man Stole $24,000 From A Pee Wee Football League

4/12/2011 - An In-Depth Logistical Exploration Of Animal Rape

4/12/2011 - Venus Serena Williams Returns To The Court In Fabulous Pink Catwoman Outfit

4/12/2011 - The UVA Lacrosse Murder Case Continues On Its Creepy Path To A Grand Jury

4/12/2011 - Jenn Sterger Speaks: Never Met Brett Favre, Never Got Paid, Betrayed By Blogger

4/12/2011 - This Celtics Lowlight Is The Most B-Team Clip Ever

4/12/2011 - Charlie Villanueva And Ryan Hollins Celebrate End Of Miserable Seasons With An Eye-Gouging Affair

4/12/2011 - Sterger On GMA: Never Met Brett Favre, Never Got Paid, Betrayed By Blogger

4/11/2011 - Jenn Sterger Talks Life After Brett Favre's Penis With Good Morning America Tomorrow

4/11/2011 - A Nervous Letter From A Fan Attending AT&T Park Tonight With Her Dodger-Loving Fiancee

4/11/2011 - Mark Sanchez Talks About Getting Caught In An Elevator, 17-Year-Old Girl

4/11/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXVII

4/11/2011 - This Is The Saddest Image To Come Out Of The Sad WNBA Draft

4/11/2011 - Man Wants Money For The "Charge" Stadium Chant That Everyone Hates

4/11/2011 - Former USD Assistant Basketball Coach And Players Charged In Game-Fixing-Marijuana-Bribery Mess

4/11/2011 - FreeDarko Says Goodbye

4/11/2011 - Charlie Davies Attempts To Save His Failed Goal Celebration By Doing "The Bernie"

4/11/2011 - Craigslist's Going Rate For A Misspelled Larry Johnson Chiefs Jersey Is $30

4/11/2011 - Only Insects Can Stop NASCAR's Chosen One, Trevor Bayne

4/11/2011 - Michael Phelps Came In Second In Something

4/11/2011 - Wall Street Journal Photoshops Signs Of Phillies Fans, Misapprehends Minds Of Phillies Fans

4/11/2011 - Soccer Rec League Captain Works Harder Than You And Has The Sweaty Email To Prove It

4/11/2011 - Who Wants To Watch Tom Brady Cry?

4/11/2011 - Canada Acknowledges That Its Hockey Is More Important Than Its Politics

4/11/2011 - If You Were Waiting On A Check From Glen Rice's Handball Tournament, We Have Bad News [UPDATE]

4/11/2011 - And When It Was All Over, Rory McIlroy Sought Solace In The Arms Of Vince McMahon's Kid

4/10/2011 - "You're Either Gonna Be A Winner, Or You're Gonna Be A Loser. And Right Now, I'm A Winner."

4/10/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXVI

4/10/2011 - Rugby Player Who Took An Axe To Three Guys Who Allegedly Gangraped His Daughter Didn't Have A Daughter After All

4/10/2011 - NHL Playoff Blood Flows Red On The Regular-Season Rink

4/10/2011 - Your Final Round Of The Masters Open Thread

4/10/2011 - Take 27 Seconds To Watch Ty Lawson's 10 Consecutive Three-Pointers For Denver Last Night

4/10/2011 - Here's Video Of A Clearly Patriotic Pirates Fan Getting Billy Clubbed And Tased

4/10/2011 - Watch An Unheralded Japanese Boxer Drop His Foe Three Times In The First Round

4/10/2011 - A Bunch Of Guys Who Dyed Their Hair Blondish Won The NCAA Hockey Championship Last Night

4/9/2011 - Cubs Fan* Who Slept On A Bar Floor Says She Likes Hot Guys Who Are Up For Anything

4/9/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXV

4/9/2011 - They Unveiled A Tim Tebow Statue In Gainesville Today

4/9/2011 - Minor Leaguer Mercifully Cut By Indians Organization, Hits Million-Dollar Scratch-Off Ticket

4/9/2011 - No Strikes, but One Out as Labor Unrest Hovers Over Video Games

4/9/2011 - Here's A Video Of Geno Auriemma's Girls Dropping It Like It's Hot

4/9/2011 - Your Masters Open Thread

4/9/2011 - The Dodgers Are Concerned Enough About Fan Violence To Offer Half-Priced Booze At Six Upcoming Games

4/9/2011 - Here's Video Of Critics Of The Guy Who Sold The Sonics To Oklahoma City Getting Thrown Out Of A Costco

4/9/2011 - Canucks Supporters Video Might Have Elevated The Big Yankees Fan To Creative-Genius Status

4/9/2011 - Even The Top Seed In The Playoffs Isn't Good Enough For This Expressive Bulls Fan

4/8/2011 - The Week In Deadspin

4/8/2011 - 109-Year-Old Woman Throws Ceremonial First Pitch Like A Girl

4/8/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXIV

4/8/2011 - "Got Rings?" T-Shirt Reminds Knicks Fans That Their Team Has Been Bad For Almost 40 Years

4/8/2011 - Jay-Z Fined $50k For Making Kentucky Freshmen's Dreams Come True

4/8/2011 - RED SOX WIN!!!

4/8/2011 - Fox 8 News Provided Us With Both Gloria James's Police Booking And On-Court Attack Videos Free Of Charge

4/8/2011 - Manny Ramirez Has Retired From Baseball After "An Issue" With Its Drug Program

4/8/2011 - Bad Beats: Handicapping An American Idol That Has Gone Horribly, Horribly Wrong

4/8/2011 - Brazilian Striker Neymar Does A Nice Bit Of Skill And Finishes With A Pass

4/8/2011 - Wayne Rooney Curses And The World Heaves

4/8/2011 - Ryan Braun Did Not Actually Suggest Prince Fielder Is A Threat To Your Bag Of Potato Chips

4/8/2011 - Derrick Rose Floats One Off The Glass, And The Bulls Take The East

4/8/2011 - Cockblocked By Weed Addiction!

4/8/2011 - Old Footage Of Gloria James Attacking A Kid On Basketball Court Is Now For Sale

4/8/2011 - Mystery Solved: Courtside Guy At Bulls Games Is Matt Pritzker, And He Is Very, Very Rich

4/8/2011 - David Stern Memorialized As A Chainsaw-Wielding Honey Badger In These NBA Lockout Attack Ads

4/8/2011 - I-Team, Do You Know Who This Perpetually Courtside Bulls Fan Is?

4/8/2011 - New Sport's Inspiration Seems To Be Every Sport Ever At Once

4/8/2011 - Bryce Harper Performs The Miracle Of Turning A Bunt Into A Single

4/8/2011 - There Were No Fans Or Cars In Attendance At This Incredible High School Dunk Contest

4/8/2011 - College Kid Who Cried "Coach Attacked Me" Apparently Decided To Steal Two Beers From The Phillies

4/8/2011 - Deadspin I-Team: Who Is The Minor-League Hockey Forbidden Dancer?

4/7/2011 - It Sure Looks Like This North Dakota Sioux Hockey Fan Has His Jeaned Ass Square In His Wife's Face

4/7/2011 - Big Yankees Fan Offers A Rebecca Black Inspired Production Just In Time For the Red Sox Series

4/7/2011 - In Vanderbilt Golf's Defense, They Were Probably Acting Like Nashville's Collegiate Golfers Do Everyday

4/7/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXIII

4/7/2011 - Nick Swisher Broke Twins Second Baseman Tsuyoshi Nishioka's Fibula, Patted His Back And Trotted Away

4/7/2011 - Eagles Lineman Todd Herremans Tweets What Everyone Thinks About Roethlisberger's Religious Beliefs

4/7/2011 - Police Report Says Gloria James Slapped A Valet In The Face And Then Fell Over

4/7/2011 - Mark Cuban Will Pay College Journalists Something To Do Something With Data About Something Having To Do With Sports

4/7/2011 - Go To Gelf's Varsity Letters Tonight And Listen To Great Boxing Writing

4/7/2011 - Ray Allen Calls Post-Game Interviews "Therapeutic," Secures His Place As Media's Darling

4/7/2011 - The Bitchy, Overwrought Rec-League Emails Of America

4/7/2011 - Intense Man Sends Email Apology To Rec Softball Team, Girlfriend For Being Too Intense

4/7/2011 - This Is A Masters Photo Unlike Any Other

4/7/2011 - We Can Infer From This Video That Heidi Watney Does Not Like Her Food Fried

4/7/2011 - How The Masters Might Make Your 3DTV Worth It

4/7/2011 - ESPN's Corporate Blog Finds Rock Bottom Somewhere In This Idiot's Office

4/7/2011 - If Boston Gets Swept By Cleveland Today, Red Sox Nation May Implode

4/7/2011 - Justin Bieber Training With Barcelona Is Much Worse Than Ochocinco In Kansas City

4/7/2011 - This Swedish Kid Sets The Standard For The Back-Flip Penalty Kick

4/7/2011 - Gloria James Arrested After Alleged Assault In Miami

4/7/2011 - Real Men Support The Cleveland Indians By Kissing One Another On Live Television

4/7/2011 - The Much Ballyhooed Nuclear-Threat Double Dong Has Arrived

4/6/2011 - There's A Teenage German Girl Who Rides Cows Like They're Horses

4/6/2011 - The Dodgers Seemingly Want Their Fans To Stop Beating People Into Comas

4/6/2011 - In Vanderbilt Baseball's Defense, They Were Probably Trying To Be Funny

4/6/2011 - 25 Jager Bombs For Only $223.75 Canadian Dollars! An Analysis Of The Epic Receipt From "The #1 Sports Bar In North America."

4/6/2011 - Another Bitchy Email Over Rec League Kickball Surfaces

4/6/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXII

4/6/2011 - LeBron James Gets Stake In Liverpool, Joins Unofficial Club For The Filthy Rich

4/6/2011 - The Name Of The Year Bracket Is Out! Taco Monster Says NOM NOM NOM NOM

4/6/2011 - Kyrie Irving Ignores Obnoxious Dookie Letter, Chooses To Enter NBA Draft

4/6/2011 - The Epic Story Of A New Jersey Prosecutor Who Stole My Idea And Made Fantasy Baseball History

4/6/2011 - The Epic Story Of A New Jersey Prosecutor Who Stole My Idea And Made Fantasy Baseball History

4/6/2011 - Cats vs. Dogs: We Have A Winner!

4/6/2011 - Wahhhhhhhhh You Put Politics In My Sports!

4/6/2011 - Sherrie Daly Identifies The "Four Groups Of Hookers" On The PGA Tour

4/6/2011 - Kobe Finally Makes His Chinese Pop Debut

4/6/2011 - Karen Sypher's Lawyers May Need A Refresher Course On Law's Finer Points [CORRECTION]

4/6/2011 - Chicago's Marty Turco Uses Bench Time To Place Bets With Fans, Write "Turco Rules!" On $5 Bills

4/6/2011 - Derrick Mason Says Roger Goodell Is A Joke For HGH Stance

4/6/2011 - This "He Said, She Said" Trial Involving An Ex-NL West Outfielder Is Getting Weird

4/6/2011 - Watch Dejan Stankovic Air Out A Goal From Midfield

4/6/2011 - Blackhawks Wing Brouwer Whiffs Badly On This Hit, Injures Shoulder

4/6/2011 - This Texas Rangers Broadcast Clip Will Someday Be Evidence In Divorce Proceedings

4/5/2011 - Watch Andruw Jones Get Hit With A Bunch Of Onion Rings

4/5/2011 - SI's Post-Championship Cover: Recycling A Jim Nantz Pun

4/5/2011 - Eric Naposki, '80s Linebacker, Will Face Murder Charges; Goodell Probably Cannot Suspend Him

4/5/2011 - Apply Within To Become The Next Head Coach Of Princeton Men's Basketball

4/5/2011 - No One Is Going To Cleveland Indians Games

4/5/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LXI

4/5/2011 - We Were All Waiting For Choir Girls To Harmonize About Derrick Rose's MVP Season To Make It Official

4/5/2011 - Callahan Breaks Ankle After Chara Shot; Rangers' Body Count Piles Up Again

4/5/2011 - John McEnroe Will Swear At You For An Hour For Just $28,500

4/5/2011 - Gros Coup De Hach À Deux Mains Is French For This Terrifying Two-Handed Hockey Slash

4/5/2011 - Cats vs. Dogs: Judgment Day Has Arrived

4/5/2011 - EA Sports' NBA Elite Takes The Year Off, New NBA Jam Coming This Fall

4/5/2011 - Smell The Pineapple, Man: A Weekend At The High Times Medical Cannabis Cup

4/5/2011 - Phillies Fans Show Commitment To The Team By Doing Keg Stands On The Train

4/5/2011 - UConn: The Unappreciated Cinderella

4/5/2011 - Dookie’s Obnoxious “Open Letter” To Kyrie Irving As Obnoxious As You’d Expect

4/5/2011 - When European Basketball Fans Get Excited, They Light Their Stadiums On Fire

4/5/2011 - Could The 2012 NFL Draft Become A Double Megadraft?!

4/5/2011 - The Quirks Of Gambling On Professional Wrestling

4/5/2011 - Snooki Body Slams Michelle McCool, And Other Great Moments From WrestleMania 27

4/5/2011 - UConn Provides An Official Celebration Video That Conveniently Excludes Rioting And Fire

4/5/2011 - The Quirks Of Gambling On Professional Wrestling

4/5/2011 - Jim Nantz Predictably Overdoes It With The Dog Puns

4/5/2011 - This Year's "One Shining Moment" Includes Very Few Moments From The Title Game

4/4/2011 - Your UConn-Butler NCAA Championship Open Thread

4/4/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LX

4/4/2011 - (Un)dead Wrestler Of The Week: The Undertaker

4/4/2011 - Kris "The Incredible Hump" Humphries Would Like You To Vote For Him For Some Things

4/4/2011 - Former National Still Hiding Out In the Women's Bathroom

4/4/2011 - Roger Clemens, Mike Piazza Make Nice

4/4/2011 - Cats vs. Dogs: Here Are Your Ferocious Final Four!

4/4/2011 - (Un)dead Wrestler Of The Week: The Undertaker

4/4/2011 - Muppet Goalie Lawsuit? Muppet Goalie Lawsuit

4/4/2011 - Kickball Rec League Captain Sends Out Fantastically Bitchy Email To His Underperforming Team

4/4/2011 - Did The Clippers' PR Guy Scrub Donald Sterling's Wikipedia Page?

4/4/2011 - Wayne Rooney Scored A Hat Trick, Swore In Celebration, Got A Two-Match Ban

4/4/2011 - If A Hockey Writers' Protest Emerges From Long Island, And No One Hears It...

4/4/2011 - Hey, Did Everyone Notice The Yankees Were Cheating?

4/4/2011 - Raiders WR Louis Murphy Arrested For Viagra Possession

4/4/2011 - This Guy Proposed To His Girlfriend, While That Guy Fellated His Churro

4/4/2011 - Remember When UConn Won A Title, And They Wanted You To Narc On The Rioting Students?

4/4/2011 - Richard Dent Has Some Amazing Golf Pants

4/3/2011 - Charles Barkley's Dome Is Clean If Only In The Mind Of One VCU Fan With A Rag

4/3/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LIX

4/3/2011 - What's Really Special About This Picture Is That Chipper Jones May Have Signed A 7-Inch Sperm Replica

4/3/2011 - The Detroit Lions Went Ahead And Emailed Their Pre-Draft Player-Visit Plans To Every Team In The League

4/3/2011 - Fulham's Michael Jackson Statue Is More Frightening Than The Balloon Creatures From "The Wiz"

4/3/2011 - If You Wanted A Think Piece About The "Hockey Luvin Homos," Puck Buddies Got Your Back

4/3/2011 - Abusive Relationships Are The Talk Of New York Baseball

4/3/2011 - Here's Video Of Derrick Rose Making Up For A Turnover With A Sky-High Blocked Shot

4/3/2011 - The Kentucky Wildcats Refused To Go Down Without A Fight Or An Internationally-Televised Nut Tap

4/2/2011 - In England, They Just Wrap Your Head Injury And Send You Back Out On The Pitch

4/2/2011 - Your Final Four Open Thread

4/2/2011 - Invisible Line Helps Oregon Win A Sub-NIT Championship

4/2/2011 - The Nationals Extend Their Lead In The Spelling-Fails Sweepstakes

4/2/2011 - A Sad Cubs Fan Has Questions About Wrigley Field Rules Pertaining To Obese Cubs Fans

4/2/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LVIII (Busted Piñata Head Edition)

4/2/2011 - This Nine-Year-Old Kid Might Well Be The World's Next Greatest Soccer Player

4/2/2011 - Here's A Picture Of Alex Ovechkin With His Arm Draped Over The First Lady's Shoulder

4/2/2011 - Dennis Rodman Recognizes The Importance Of Family

4/1/2011 - Yet Another Reason To Hate The Midwest: This Guy's Cubs Favre Jersey

4/1/2011 - We Are All Dave McKenna LVII

4/1/2011 - The Week In Deadspin

4/1/2011 - John Salley Story Corner: A Teammate Has A Disgusting Hookup Failure Of His Own

4/1/2011 - Here's A Textbook Soccer-Ball-To-Child's-Head Video

4/1/2011 - Cats vs. Dogs: The Top Seeds Have Left The Building

4/1/2011 - The Cardinals Are Pretty Much Cursed Now, Right?

4/1/2011 - This Time, Butler's The Favorite

4/1/2011 - Cockblocked By Cowboys!

4/1/2011 - Courtroom Sketches Of A Guy Doing Courtroom Sketches At The Barry Bonds Trial

4/1/2011 - Your Other Opening Day Open Thread

4/1/2011 - Texas HS Baseball Players Charged In Chicken Decapitations

4/1/2011 - Go Deep Inside Brian Wilson's Beard

4/1/2011 - “Wait For Iiiiiit.” When Memes And Catchphrases Take Over Your Brain

4/1/2011 - Holy Shit Los Angeles, You Might Have The Worst Sports Fans In America

4/1/2011 - UFC Fighter Stats Compare Favorably To Chong Li, Paco, Frank Dux From Bloodsport

4/1/2011 - One Day Into The Season, The Nationals Have Had Two Spelling Fails

4/1/2011 - Last Night's Lakers-Mavs Game Got A Little Bit Brawl-y

4/1/2011 - Crying Baby Distracts Tennis Player, Tennis Player Lobs Ball Toward Crying Baby

4/1/2011 - Short White Guy Wins College Dunk Contest

4/1/2011 - Self-Proclaimed Jersey-Chasers Bring UNC Hoopsters To Sorority Formal, Warn Sisters First

4/1/2011 - It Took A Self-Proclaimed "Hockey Luvin Homo" To Make A Canucks-Kings Game Noteworthy

4/1/2011 - Here's Video Of A Lady Using Rail-Dance Spasms To Seduce A Goal From A Minor-League Hockey Game